Though the BB19 Houseguest tried to remain positive, she rarely hid her disappointment at not being able to compete in endurance and physical HOH Competitions.
That's why Christmas' long-awaited HOH victory is all the more satisfying: After the 33-year-old beat out fellow misfit Paul in the most recent HOH Competition, the win brought her closer to winning the $500K and left her feeling rejuvenated, fired up, and happier than ever.
WATCH: Christmas Wins Tales From Decrypt And Becomes The Next HOH On CBS All Access
What did Christmas want to tell all her fans?
And what juicy information did she spill about her fellow BB19 Houseguests?
Read below for Christmas' entire blog sharing her thoughts on being HOH:
First, THANK YOU for all of your love and support during my recovery process with my broken (shattered) foot. I actually just received my boot TODAY and am making great progress.
Six weeks down and about six more to go until I am fully walking again. Obviously this route was NOT what I had planned for my Big Brother experience but it seems to be a blessing in disguise.
Although I am not cleared for most physical competitions, I am giving it my all in anything that I can and I hope that the world can see that. I have a great team that I am supporting and that are supporting me. I now truly believe that we can make it to the Finals, the misfits that we are!
When I broke my foot, any thoughts of being in the Finals were shattered with my break but I refused to quit and kept moving forward no matter what, trying to get as far as I possibly could. I wanted to show America and the world that no matter what hand you are dealt in life, you can control your experience and influence your outcome.
I wanted to show everyone that it IS possible to do extraordinary things, especially as the underdog. Now, being the first confirmed to Top 8… I am sitting in a position to possibly be TOP THREE! It simply goes to show what not giving up can do.
My housemates are really special people. They each have their own personality and flair they add to the house makeup. I am especially grateful for two.
Josh has seen my badass side since Day 1, but he also saw how much I wanted to help him get through his hard start. He truly cares about people and sees their BEST side no matter what they have done or what they do to him. I have watched Josh grow tremendously in this house, personally and game.
In all honesty, I am blessed that he gravitated to me at the start of this game. He’ll be my big meatball for life.
Paul is my other misfit team member. Seeing him on Big Brother last season was impressive, but knowing him in the house this season is even more impressive— mind blowing even. His heart is true and he always is uplifting even in hard situations.
Paul had a hard start here and it took him some time to see where I stood with him, but now that he sees that I have had his back from the beginning, loyalty will prevail. Paul has a special place in my heart in the game and outside.
Friendship, loyalty, and gratitude always. I can’t wait to see what we can do in the next few weeks. Wouldn’t it be wild???
OK, a little on the Houseguests! I am taken aback by Alex’s daily prayer for my recovery. She is truly a tiger and a fire!!!
Matt is hilarious with Raven—they really only cook, clean, and clown around. Not a bad way to spend the summer.
Kevin’s stories are the best but I have NO IDEA what is true in them and what is made up.
Jason is a close second with his stories. I can’t believe he just found out about baby #2!! CONGRATS!!!
Mark is a sweet soul but made some really bad alliances to start…YIKES!
Elena was (and is) so cool but those temper tantrums were intense. I really wish she would have stood by Mark.
Ramses was so LIT but completely spooked everyone out, but that was because he was working for the worst player of all time.
Jess, super fun girl but I told her exactly what would happen, and it DID. She deserved Jury—not Cody.
Jillian was really coming around and was a riot but I have to admit, I am glad she was evicted instead of me.
Dominique seemed to lose it all together and couldn’t trust anyone even when she needed to. I don’t think she ever trusted anyone a bit the entire time.
Cameron, sorry you left so soon but I LOVE that you almost beat Cody on the Battle Back.
And Megan–what a disappointment.
Being HOH has really brought back some spirit to me! Since the break, I have been really trying to contribute as much as possible to the game for my team but in certain competitions I was literally a lump on a log! LOL! And, being a very physical and aggressive competitor it was very difficult to brush off the frustration of not competing in a game where I thought my strongest asset was my physical ability.
I will tell you that it isn’t all positive, even when there is a clear agenda. Everyone knows this game creates a lot of distrust and paranoia and I am discovering it is even more when you are HOH.
There is no such thing as a smooth week in Big Brother and everyone wants a piece of the pie. Having people "chat" with you more in two days than they did in 60 days is transparent and annoying.
If you haven’t connected with me by now, keep on walking because you will only dig your own grave if you try to start while I am HOH. No thanks!
A few thoughts before I run out of time… just in case, so apologies if this is not so eloquent.
Mom & John, Dad, Kole & Chris, and Christopher, I love you all and can’t wait to see all of you again! We’ll have a family get together SOON! Jenny, I know you are doing great!! Get yourself a ticket to come out for the weekend wrap of the show.
Thank you again to all of the Big Brother fans out there and my fans. I felt your love when I was granted the temptation which allowed me to make a HUGE move in the game to help get out one of the nastiest persons I have ever met and shift the power in the house.
Beyond that, I hope that I am making you all proud!
Your all American Badass
Stream full episodes of every past season of Big Brother on CBS All Access.