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Wednesday, April 27, 1994

Top Ten My Secretary's Complaints About Me
  
The way I'm always borrowing her white-out to paint my fingernails
My strict "No talking" policy during "The Montel Williams Show"
Having to feed the squirrel that lives in my hair
I'm just too damn goofy-lookin' to take seriously.
Every morning from 8:00 to 10:00, it's ping-pong with Ms. Carol Channing.
The unbearable stench of Vicks Vaporub and cheddar cheese
About three hundred times a day, I buzz her on the intercom and shout, "Breaker 109, good buddy."
When I'm out of town, I have that woman break into her house.
I frequently walk around the office in nothing but a Menendez wig.
The daily canings
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