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Monday, March 13, 1995

Top Ten Signs You're Watching a Bad Daytime Talk Show
  
Whenever the host hands the microphone to an audience member, they say, "this really sucks!"
You can't tell the transexuals from the transvestites
Every day, the same subject: people who married their fiances
Host tells every panelist, "man, you are one screwed up freak"
Audience members keep asking, "can we go watch O.J.?"
Guests take turns slow-dancing with a tranquilized monkey
The topic is "let's look for Swedes"
It's just a guy whacking people with microphone (videotape of Dave)
It stars a small, absent-minded woman named "Rosa"
Host keeps asking, "what would Gump do?"
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