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Monday, May 20, 1996

Top Ten Highlights of O.J.'s Visit to New York
  
Kept mistaking New York City rats for his lawyers
As tribute to F. Lee Bailey, drank everything in his hotel mini-bar
Looked in Yellow Pages under "Real Killers," didn't find any, went golfing
To raise money for legal fees, wandered subway stations trying to get shot by Bernhard Goetz
Saw movie in Times Square about his trial: "O.J.'s Hung Jury"
Killed dozens in Midtown by hitting golf balls off the top of the Empire State Building
Went to Macy's and bought a diggity-dank new pair of gloves
Registered at hotel under the alias "I.M. Guilty"
For hotel wake-up call, asked for three loud thumps on air-conditioner
Nostalgic slow-speed taxi ride from the airport
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