DAVETV If you could look at only one thing on the Internet, DaveTV would be the obvious choice. What other so-called "website" lets you watch LATE SHOW Highlights, Comedy Clips, Slideshows, Stupid Trick clips and The Tony Mendez Show?
TOP TEN LIST You know it, you love it, you can't live without it: the revolutionary comedy bit that won Dave the Nobel Peace Prize. Check out the latest Top Ten List here.
TOP TEN ARCHIVES Old Top Ten Lists never die, they just get archived. The Top Ten Archives is searchable by date and keyword. Also, please note that the word "archives" contains the word "chives."
TOP TEN CONTEST So you think you're as funny as Dave's writers? Or maybe you just enjoy wasting time at work? See if you've got the chops to win a great prize in our weekly Top Ten Contest.
TOP TEN SEARCH Search Results.
TOP TEN SEARCH Search Results.
WAHOO GAZETTE LATE SHOW staffer Mike McIntee gives you a daily show summary and the behind-the-scenes lowdown with his daily Wahoo Gazette. So much juicy inside information that you'll say "Wahoo!"
THE WAHOO GAZETTE ARCHIVE Mike McIntee's popular Wahoo Gazette is archived here in the aptly- named Wahoo Gazette Archive. You can search by date, keyword, or show number, or even Dave's tie pattern (coming June 2012).
THE WAHOO GAZETTE ARCHIVE Mike McIntee's popular Wahoo Gazette is archived here in the aptly- named Wahoo Gazette Archive. You can search by date, keyword, or show number, or even Dave's tie pattern (coming June 2012).
Thursday, November 16, 2000
Top Ten Things The Founding Fathers Would Say If They Were
Alive Today
"Remember that electoral college thing we made up
when we were drunk? They're still using it!"
"Maybe that ruthless monarchy thing in England wasn't
such a bad idea after all..."
"Good to see Florida is still using the same old
voting machines"
"That's odd -- in my day, we also had a senator named
Strom Thurmond"
"So that's the Washington Monument? Yeah, in his dreams"
"Giuliani has really wrecked Times Square"
"We risk our lives to form this great nation and you
wanna let George W. Bush run it?!"
"Back in our time there certainly wasn't anyone as
man-tastic as Ricky Martin"
"He did what in the Oval Office?"
"Screw this, we're going to Canada"
·
"I think I'll look up the great great great
granddaughter of that intern Abigail Lewinsky"
·
"Why did you have to use a picture of me on the
quarter from my ponytail phase?"
·
"Thank God U2 dropped the whole techno-thing and
returned to straight rock"
·
"'Hanging chad,' 'pregnant chad': has the land been
overtaken by madness?"
·
"270 million people and the best you could do was
Bush and Gore?"
·
"Governor Bush should put a mustard plaster on his
face and have his physician attach some leeches"
·
"Since our wives are dead, is it okay if we go after
those Gore girls?"
·
"We forgot to put this in the Constitution, but if
there's a tie, you give it to the guy who's not dumb as a sock"
·
"Who hath let ye dogs out?"
"Late Show" Rewind: Week of July 27, 2009 Adam, Katie, Eric, Amy, Mark and more. All the best LS highlights from the week of July 27, 2009.
