DAVETV If you could look at only one thing on the Internet, DaveTV would be the obvious choice. What other so-called "website" lets you watch LATE SHOW Highlights, Comedy Clips, Slideshows, Stupid Trick clips and The Tony Mendez Show?
TOP TEN LIST You know it, you love it, you can't live without it: the revolutionary comedy bit that won Dave the Nobel Peace Prize. Check out the latest Top Ten List here.
TOP TEN ARCHIVES Old Top Ten Lists never die, they just get archived. The Top Ten Archives is searchable by date and keyword. Also, please note that the word "archives" contains the word "chives."
TOP TEN CONTEST So you think you're as funny as Dave's writers? Or maybe you just enjoy wasting time at work? See if you've got the chops to win a great prize in our weekly Top Ten Contest.
TOP TEN SEARCH Search Results.
TOP TEN SEARCH Search Results.
WAHOO GAZETTE LATE SHOW staffer Mike McIntee gives you a daily show summary and the behind-the-scenes lowdown with his daily Wahoo Gazette. So much juicy inside information that you'll say "Wahoo!"
THE WAHOO GAZETTE ARCHIVE Mike McIntee's popular Wahoo Gazette is archived here in the aptly- named Wahoo Gazette Archive. You can search by date, keyword, or show number, or even Dave's tie pattern (coming June 2012).
THE WAHOO GAZETTE ARCHIVE Mike McIntee's popular Wahoo Gazette is archived here in the aptly- named Wahoo Gazette Archive. You can search by date, keyword, or show number, or even Dave's tie pattern (coming June 2012).
Friday, July 30, 2004
Top Ten Signs Your Lifeguard Is Nuts
Because of paperwork, his rescues generally take 3 to 5
business days
That white stuff on his nose? Ranch dressing
When waves destroy a sand castle, frantically searches for
tiny people
If swimmers go out too far, gets their attention by firing
a spear-gun at them
When sitting in the lifeguard stand, insists on wearing a bib
Will only come to the rescue of people named "Larry"
Has a paralyzing fear of terry cloth
He's engaged to his whistle
Last week someone needed assistance and he said, "Ah
screw it - - let Aquaman take this one"
Keeps trying to give himself CPR
·
Once performed CPR on a damp piece of driftwood
·
Saw a surfer wrestling with a surfer - - saved the shark
·
Boasts of having the tannest tongue at the beach
·
Two words: seaweed hairpiece
·
Charges down to the waterline screaming "Pirates!
Everyone out!"
·
Will only work winters
Johnny Depp Doesn't Watch His Own Movies He's one of the biggest stars in the world -- so why doesn't Johnny Depp watch his own movies?
