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Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Top Ten Signs Your Weathercaster is Nuts
 Top Ten   
Urges people to drink plenty of sunscreen
Only shows clouds that look like Jessica Alba
Can't stop eating them contaminated tomatoes
He's curled up on the floor meowing like a kitty
Changes 3 H's from "hazy, hot and humid" to "hookers, hookers, hookers"
Says the heat wave will continue until government gives him $10 million and a helicopter to Mexico
Tells viewers the storm left town faster than his slutty ex-wife
His predictions are about as reliable as George W. Bush (OMG, did you hear what Letterman said?!?!?!?!?)
Keeps cool by doing tequila shots off the sports guy's stomach
Reads forecast with his doppler hanging out
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Uses heat wave as an excuse to show "Girls Gone Wild" videos

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Says there's no point in doing five-day forecast because we'll all be dead from heatstroke by Thursday

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Publicly challenges those national weather service punks to a knife fight

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Excuses himself with "I have to take a category 5 leak"

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Predicts temperatures "somewhere between zero and 150"

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