Microsoft just released their new Windows XP operating systems and people are reportedly having problems with it. One of our staffers just purchased the XP software today and he too had his share of difficulty. We take a look at his troubles. We see a young graphic designer toying with the new computer thing. Suddenly, the computer explodes. And then suddenly again, the young graphic designer explodes. This will be very difficult for Microsoft to explain away.

HALLOWEEN PSYCHIC SANDWICH: You know we play. We go into Rupert's, meet a psychic, Rupert makes a sandwich, and the psychic has to guess the name of the sandwich. Today we add a twist. It's Halloween Psychic Sandwich. The Psychic taking part is not a psychic at all, but an intuitive. She's Intuitive Deborah Lynn. What is the difference between a psychic and an intuitive? A psychic actively train themselves to seek information about a person's past and future, an intuitive lets the information come naturally. It sounds to me as if an intuitive is simply a lazy psychic.* (* denotes a joke I've used before and will likely use again.)
We meet Deborah who is dressed as a witch. Dave is curious about tonight's yet to be played Yankee game and wants to know if Deborah has any vibes about the game? Deborah says, "I hope the Yankees win. My husband is a big Yankee fan." Dave says that's fine but wants to know if she has any special "feeling" concerning tonight's game. Says Deborah, "I'm hoping hoping hoping the Yankees win." Dave decides not to pursue this line of questioning. In Halloween Psychic Sandwich, we are adding a new level to the game. Tonight, Rupert will be wearing a Halloween mask while making the sandwich. Deborah will have to either guess the name of the prepared sandwich or the mask Rupert is wearing to win at Halloween Psychic Sandwich. Dave throws Halloween Psychic Sandwich over to announcer Alan Kalter who will tell us the ingredients of tonight's sandwich, the name of the sandwich, and the mask Rupert will be wearing. A sporting Deborah Lynn holds her ears while Alan gives the information.

"Tonight's Halloween Psychic Sandwich is made with Brie, sun dried tomato, romaine, pesto on a baguette. It's known to Rupert Jee customers as the 'CBS Orchestra.' Rupert is wearing a Dave Letterman mask."

Deborah is blindfolded and Rupert begins to make the sandwich. After a few maneuvers, Rupert is reminded by someone off camera to put the mask on. Rupert puts on the Dave Letterman mask and continues. The simple preparation of the "CBS Orchestra" is now made difficult. When Rupert finally completes the sandwich, it is handed to Deborah. Rupert in mask is instructed by Dave to remove the blindfold on Deborah. The Stangels in the shack yell out, "Don't remove the blindfold!" since she'll be able to see the mask Rupert is wearing. It's too late. The blindfold is removed. Rupert is standing behind Deborah and she does not yet realize Rupert is wearing a mask. Her total concentration is on the sandwich. The sandwich she guesses? "The Dave Letterman." She slowly turns to look at Rupert. When she sees Rupert in the frightful mask, she lets out a screech of fear. I was laughing too hard to follow the rest of Halloween Psychic Sandwich. In come the models with a giant gift certificate for one 13 ounce bag of fun size Snickers bars.
Was Deborah right in her guess of "Dave Letterman"? I don't know. I'll have to watch the replay.

And that's how we played Halloween Psychic Sandwich.

DAVID SPADE: From TV's Just Shoot Me, Thursdays at 9:30 on NBC. You may have seen David Spade on the Concert for New York City last Saturday night. He followed Richard Gere. Says Spade, Gere "put the 'Boo' in Buddha." Spade is an Arizona lad and many pure baseball fans cringed when he said, "I've never been to a Diamondback ballgame before. I sat behind the Arizona dugout for the World Series game 2." He traded hats with Diamondback pitcher Curt Schilling. D'oh! But from I've heard, anybody could have probably bought a box seat for the World Series in Arizona the day of the game. The Zona fans are rabid. They've had to wait 4 long years to get to the World Series. No one should have to wait that long.

MARV ALBERT: As expected, lots of Michael Jordan talk. Marv broadcast the Knicks-Wizards game Tuesday night immediately after the taping of our show. Dave was confused. "Aren't the Washington Wizards the team that always played the Harlem Globetrotters?" Marv chuckled, explaining that Dave was thinking of the Washington Generals and player/coach Red Klotz. (ed.note: Red Klotz - great set shot).
Marv says of Michael Jordan: "He's older now. He doesn't have the same lift as he did when younger." DON'T I KNOW IT! As we age, none of us have the same lift.
Marv then graced us with some Ball State University Highlights, beginning with the big upset of the Toledo Rockets on Saturday October 20th. We see Ball State Cardinal Corey Parchman return a kickoff 100 yards for the winning touchdown in the 24-20 win against the 23rd ranked Rockets. Then we jump ahead to last weeks win against the Connecticut Huskies as we see Marcus Merriweather's 4-yard touchdown run and Mike Langford's 21-yard field goal to supply all the points needed in the 10-5 Cardinal victory. Ball State is enjoying a 3 game winning streak and face the Central Michigan Chippewas this Saturday at Ball State. It's Family Weekend! Back from commercial, we get to enjoy once again Marv's Bloopers. Always enjoyable eye-candy.

LAURIE ANDERSON: Sang "Life On A String" from her CD of the same name.

And that was our show for Tuesday, October 30, 2001. WAHOO EXTRA

Since when did Melanie Griffith turn into Cindy Brady?

There's a new game I play at home. I call it "How Many Time Will I Be Knocked Off the AOL?" I set the over/under at 2 and a half for the first half hour and then log on to the AOL. I usually bet the over. If I'm knocked off three or more times, I give myself $10. Less than 3 times, I put $10 into the kitty. It eases my frustration.

New York City has its first case of inhalation anthrax. It's a 61-year-old woman who works as a stockroom clerk at Manhattan Eye, Ear and Throat Hospital, or MEETH as we called it back when I worked there. Yes, I was once employed at MEETH as a security guard: post NYPD, pre-Late Show. If I recall correctly, the stock room was located in the basement, not far from the in-house pharmacy. The hospital clinic is visited by many walk-in patients each day and the stockroom is directly below the clinic area, a simple walk down a short flight of open steps. I don't believe I know the woman in question.

Working as a security guard at a hospital can be endless, mind-numbing work. 15 minutes into the day and I would be checking my watch for quitting time. The job did have its upside, though. I got to see the Grand Rebbe Menachem Schneerson And I got to meet Joey Buttafuocco. (The two do not belong in the same sentence.) It was the early 1990's and Joey had brought his wife Mary Jo in to have some facial work done. The media got wind of the hospital's high-profile patient and were camped outside looking for a photo-op or a quote. I suggested we open the back entrance so Joey could come and go as he pleased without bother. I really wasn't thinking of his peace of mind, I was more interested in mine. It would be easier on me if he didn't have to deal with the picture takers outside. After a day and a half of his not being bothered once by the media, I could tell Joey was beginning to miss the attention. He began hanging out by the front door, pacing back and forth by the window. I could only shake my head in disbelief when I saw Joey returning outside from a bite to eat walking right past the picture takers. Instead of secretly coming in the back door, he returned in grand fashion through the front. The picture takers snapped away, Joey staying just long enough so they all got the shots they wanted. He came in self-satisfied, mockingly referring to those outside as 'sdd'-holes. I sensed I knew Joey Buttafoucco a little better at that moment. Later that day after returning from a few rounds of cocktails, I saw him playfully trying to pick up a nurse. Oh, that Joey! Finally when it was time to leave, the head of security, the head surgeon, and the hospital director all came to escort Joey and wife out through the back door. They treated him as if he were a big shot (no pun intended), as if his celebrity had to do with accomplishment or talent. I had to hand it to Joey for he was able to see right through the high-priced simpletons. As Joey and Mary Jo were about to enter the waiting limo (what else), Joey brushed past the hospital honchos and made his way over to me to shake my hand, thanking me for all I did during his stay. I chuckled and said, "Sure Mr. Buttafoucco. No problem." The hospital heads looked down at me with jealousy. I laughed at their pathetic shallowness. And that was my time spent with Joey Buttafoucco at MEETH. I have no such stories about the Grand Rebbe. WORLD SERIES RECAP

You hear it every year now. "World Series ratings down." I first really became aware of baseball in 1967 during the St. Louis Cardinal/Boston Red Sox World Series. I was 9 years old. I remember glimpses of the '66 Series between the Orioles and the Dodgers and even the '65 Series between the Twins and the Dodgers. I actively followed the '68 Tigers/Cardinals World Series. By 1969, I was a die-hard fan of the game, culminating with the amazing World Series between the Mets and the O's. It was the World Series games that got me hooked and all these games were played in the daytime. I was hooked because I was able to watch these games. With today's World Series games starting at 8:00-8:30 on weekdays, 9-year-olds are getting ready for bed. They do not get to see the World Series. And this has been going on since the early 70's, World Series games played on weekday nights. The World Series is the biggest hook baseball has and they drop it in the water when all the fish are getting ready for bed! (How's that for a metaphor!) The reason the ratings are down is because the games start too late in the east and the fan base has never been established from years past. 9-year-olds in 1976 are now 34. Baseball missed the opportunity to hook them during their critical period. And that's why they ain't watching today.

Quick World Series talk: Early in last night's game, a Yankee hit a high pop fly that landed untouched 10 feet in front of home plate. The spin on the ball caused it to kick foul. The runner on second came racing around to score. There was a lot of confusion. I immediately realized it was a foul ball. The director, Bill Webb, did not. While the confusion in the announcers booth was being clarified by the umpire at home, the shots we saw were of the Yankee dugout, the Diamondback dugout, the pitcher, the guy who "scored," the Yankee manager, the Diamondback manager, and the catcher. Not once did we see the umpire. The excited announcers and director finally caught up with the umpire and made the right call. It was a foul ball.
Meanwhile, announcer Tim McCarver was going on and on about how much spin was on the ball for it to kick foul the way it did. Tim acted surprised. Tim, Tim, Tim. You were a major league catcher. A ball that goes up that high in the air and lands only 10 feet from home plate will always have a lot of spin on the ball. It has to. You should know that. You were a major league catcher. I know about the spin of the ball and all I did was catch some Sunday morning softball games. If it didn't kick foul, THAT would have been surprising.

Yankees win Game 3. I hope the Diamondbacks pitch Schilling in Game 4. The way he's pitching, anything to disrupt Curt Schilling's usual routine will be a blessing for the Yankees. And even if the D'Backs win Game 4, we'll have Mussina facing Miguel Batista at Yankee Stadium in Game 5. I like the Yankee chances in that game. Game 6 will give us Pettitte against Randy Johnson. That's the key game. Johnson had 10 strikeouts in 5 innings on Sunday. He only had 1 more K the final 4 innings. My guess is the Yankees learned a lot from that game. It's a stretch but I'm guessing Randy will be wild, the Yankees will run wild, and the Yankees will force the Diamondbacks into some messy play. I know it's my Yankee bias talking but I like our chances in Game 6, too. And for Game 7, Roger Clemens vs. a tired Schilling, with all the pressure on the Diamondbacks. What a difference a win can make.