CBS | Late Show with David Letterman :


	Tonight's Guests: Joaquin Phoenix, SI Swimsuit Cover Model Bar Rafaeli, Anthony Hamilton

This Week's Show Recap:

Mon | Tue | Wed | Thu | Fri


			Thursday, November 29, 2001 Show #1719
			By Michael Z. McIntee	Change Text Color: Black \| White


	Julia Stiles; and Jeff Gordon. PLUS: Stump the Band; the Oprah Log; What's New In The New Oprah Magazine. STUMP THE BAND: property of Carson Productions. Dave goes into the audience, audience members have a song in their hearts, and then we ask Paul and the band if they know the song? Dave asks Paul if he is ready and we cut to see Paul in the Carnac hat. Paul puts an envelope up to his head and says, "Soccer, Bowling, Osama bin Laden." Paul rips open the envelope and blows into it to give clear passage. Unfortunately, Paul blew the envelope out of his hand. Finding a blue card nearby, Paul reads the question that was inside the envelope: "Name two balls and a dick." 1. David Itamiller of Mitchell, South Dakota, Talk of the Corn Palace. Didn't our George Clarke go to the Corn Palace in his "Quest for Corn"? I was going to ask George but I kind of remember that whole "Quest" to be a sore subject to George, so I decided to skip it. David Itamiller's song: If You Weren't Dutch. Paul gave a hearty attempt but did not know the song. The best part of this whole thing was watching the guy in front of Itamiller checking himself out in the monitor. He seemed impressed. 2. Debbie Busch of Seminole, Florida: Tampa Bay Buccaneer talk. How they doing? Debbie says, "I wish they were doing better." Dave follows this with, "Isn't that always the story with the Tampa Bay Buccaneers?" Debbie works at the Home Depot, which prompts Dave to inquire about some paneling. Debbie's song: I Love The Mountains. I just knew Paul was going to play off the Alicia Bridges song, I Love the Nightlife. Paul did not know the song. Debbie lives in the flattest state in the country and her song is I Love The Mountains? 3. Buddy Angel of Dallas, Texas: A used-car salesman, and yet, he looks honest. Go figure. Buddy's song: I Won't Go Huntin' With You, Jake. Will Lee takes a shot at the song and although he did not come up with the right song, I enjoyed it more than Buddy's. QUEST TO GUEST: OPRAH LOG: DAY 22: Has she called yet? Dave promises to buy Oprah a used car from Buddy Angel if she agrees to have him on the show. Dave phones Art and learns Oprah had not called. Today's entry: "Did not hear from Oprah." This Oprah thing is really getting Dave down. He's been getting a lot of responses, just not from Oprah. He's heard from Connie and Maury Chung, everybody but Oprah. Dave's becoming crestfallen. Paul sings It Ain't Oprah 'Til It's Oprah but I'm not sure if it helped much. Dave is sad. Did you happen to see what's in the new Oprah magazine? It's a guide entitled, "Not Giving Up Hope." Dave exclaims, "Oprah has given me hope to being on Oprah!" It is filled with inspirational quotes. This from comic dramatist, Terence: "While there's life, there's hope." And this from Mahatma Gandhi: "We must be the change we wish to see in the world." Hey, you can't go wrong taking advice from Gandhi and Terence. It seems Dave found new life. Says Dave, "There ain't an ounce of quit in this kid." JULIA STILES: She's not attending the college she's attending. That's about all I got out of the interview. That's no fault of Julia's, I just got vacation on the mind. Dave and Julia talked about the Polar Bear Club, her so-called studies, and her hopes of becoming an actress after graduating. Julia appears in *The Business of Strangers* which opens in selected cities Friday December 7th. JEFF GORDON: He's 30 and he's won the NASCAR Winston Cup 4 times already. I never thought I would say this but I'm beginning to pick up and enjoy the auto racing interviews. I'm getting to know the sport. My brother-in-law John is a big NASCAR fan and he told me a lot of NASCAR fans don't like Gordon that much. This surprised me since he seems great whenever he's on the show. My bro-in-law says it's because Gordon wins all the time, is real young, and "hasn't paid his dues," whatever that means. Since I've been following the CART circuit and Team Rahal for a few years now, I saw this as a topic of conversation for me and my brother-in-law John. I'm not much the conversationalist so I latch on to anything I can. I saw my John a few weeks ago and mentioned how Kenny Brack came in 2nd behind Gil de Ferran in the CART championships. I was looking forward to his insights as to how Brack faltered and de Ferran came on the final few weeks of the season. I knew Brack was in trouble near the end of the season when, trailing de Ferran by 8 points, he had only two races left and only one of them on an oval. John says, "I don't follow the CART." Oh well, I took a shot. I guess it's back to our usual conversation of, "Another beer, John?" And that was our show for Thursday November 29, 2001. Unfortunately, we ran out of time for the musical group Cake. They sounded great during rehearsal. Their new CD is called *Comfort Eagle. After we get Osama, Disney wants to buy Afghanistan and turn it into a new tourist attraction called, "Cave Town." The final note on the Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer* Herbie/Hermey controversy: From Nolan Clinard of High Point, North Carolina "From http://www.tvparty.com/xmasrudolph.html - 'One thing I should make clear is that the elf who wants to be a dentist is named Hermey, Why everyone is calling him 'Herbie'? I will never fully understand. Maybe one day someone will correct the error because it is simply not right to change a character's name that has become a television icon.' This is from someone who worked on the show. There you have it - right from the horse's mouth." The reason there is a controversy is because early in the Rudolph show, the head elf CLEARLY calls the dentist elf by the name "Herbie." Two and a half hour commute this morning. An hour and a half to get on to the George Washington Bridge and then they have the nerve to charge you for it. I wish the New York/New Jersey Port Authority ran their business like Dominoes Pizza - if it takes longer than a half-hour, it's free. Hey, don't go anywhere. Here comes Friday's Wahoo today! And with a detailed CBS Mailbag, answers and everything! Friday, November 30, 2001 / Show #1720 Jada Pinkett Smith; Thomas Friedman; and a quick hello from Eddie Brill. PLUS: CBS Mailbag; Day 23 of the Oprah Log; bin Laden's Mountain Fortress; and a Top Ten List. QUEST TO GUEST: Oprah Log: Day 23 - "Did not hear from Oprah" Dave continues to get discouraged by the silence of Oprah. He says, "It's no longer a joke." At the beginning, the Oprah Log was filled with titters and giggles but it's now gone on too long. Dave looks directly into the camera and says to Oprah, "Oprah, let me tell you something. During last year's election, do you remember how the nation felt when it was filled with uncertainty? The nation was torn apart." The same seems to be happening now. Oprah, please call. Dave can barely find the energy to cue Paul's ode, It Ain't Oprah 'Til It's Oprah. Thank goodness we're going on vacation. The whole staff is humming that damn It Ain't Oprah song. CBS MAILBAG LETTER #1: From Carrie Palmer of Iowa City, Iowa: "Dear Dave, Have you seen Dick Cheney lately?" Dave hasn't seen him but did find an old photograph of Dick. He cut to a shot of Dick Cheney's 3rd grade class. Cheney is near the middle of the class of 3rd graders, looking much like he does today. Cue card master Tony Mendez mumbles loud enough for Dave to hear, "I don't get it." Dave has to explain the joke. "See, he looked the same in 3rd grade as he does now." What's that saying about having to explain a joke? LETTER #2: From Steve Gordon of San Diego, California: "Dear Dave, Why does Biff do that thing with the pushpins?" Dave answers, "Well Steve, go outside and take a look." We cut to Steve in his living room in San Diego. Steve is confused, "'Go outside and take a look?' What does that mean?" Steve opens the front door and looks out. His eyes widen as he sees a giant pushpin sticking into the ground just outside his house. Biff's huge head enters as he laughs his maniacal laugh. And now a peek behind the scenes at the Late Show. The shot of the homes of which the giant Biff rises behind were fake. They were merely small models. The sharp-eyed Late Show viewer would have realized this since "Steve" was from San Diego and the homes in the shot had Frazier Firs on the front lawn. LETTER #3: From Bill Osman of Jefferson City, Missouri: "Dear Dave, Who turns out the lights in the theater after everyone goes home?" That would be Harold, Dave tells us. Dave directs our attention to Harold who happens to be back stage. Harold says, "The lights in the Ed Sullivan Theater are controlled by a complex computer system that's very difficult to operate." How about a demonstration? "Sure," says Harold. He proceeds to pick up a baseball bat and smash all the lights. And now another peek behind the scene of the Late Show. The Harold letter was done LIVE right by the shack backstage. Some months ago, Biff did a piece LIVE in the same location. During that show, Barbara Gaines and I were caught on camera in the corner of your TV screen. This time, I reminded all concerned to keep the background free and clear during this piece. LETTER #4: From Matt Tillman of Seattle, Washington: "Dear Dave, Do you think Osama bin Laden will ever be caught?" Dave admits that to be a very tough question. Here to give an update is 4-Star General William Delace. The General enters. He says, "The search for Osama bin Laden continues. And with the holidays coming, we're not the only ones looking for him. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Santa Claus." Santa enters. "Hello, everybody. It's me, Santa Claus. I'd like to address Osama bin Laden if I may. Osama, I've got all kinds of wonderful toys, gifts and candy for you. But I have no idea how to find you. You're making Santa very, very sad." The General takes over. "You wouldn't want to make Santa Claus sad now would you, Osama? To avoid missing out on all your presents, send you exact coordinates of your cave to: Santa Claus, care of the U.S. Khanabad Military Base in Karshi, Uzbekistan. And come Christmas Eve, Santa's gonna use his state of the art high precision satellite guidance system to drop those presents right down your damn chimney. Merry Christmas, Osama." I think this'll work. Top Ten: Questions On The Application for Doorman At Osama bin Laden's Cave Complex #8. "You're not taking this job so you can kill Osama and get the $25 million, are you?" #6. "List three references who can vouch for your beard." JADA PINKETT SMITH: Dressed in all black. Jada is appearing in the Christmas Day release of the film, *Ali. It'll be hard to do such a great subject justice. I hope it succeeds. Will Smith* plays Muhammad Ali. Jon Voight plays Howard Cosell. Didn't Voight just get finished playing FDR? Dave and Jada talked about making biscuits. "If you want them soft and fluffy," says Jada, "you have to knead the dough gently." I'm on vacation as soon as I'm done typing this. I'm cutting everything short. Hope you understand. THOMAS FRIEDMAN: Sometimes when you watch this show, you can learn something. Thomas Friedman is a two-time Pulitzer Prize winning journalist, a best-selling author, and the foreign affairs columnist for The New York Times. He had some very interesting things to say about the Mid-East and Afghanistan, stuff you can use at cocktail parties during the holidays. "The people of many of these countries blame us (U.S.) for their bad governments." "The will not be over until we get Osama dead or dead." "War doesn't solve anything, but guess what, neither does social work." "Saddam is next. He has to start abiding by the United Nations demand on weapons inspections." Three ACTS with Thomas. Lots of good information. EDDIE BRILL: We ran out of time for comedian Eddie Brill. Eddie will be appearing at the Skyline Comedy Café in Appleton, Wisconsin, December 5th through the 8th. He also touted a comedy CD called, *Comics Come Home VI* to support the Cam Nealy cancer foundation. And that was our show for Friday November 30, 2001. NEXT WEEK'S PREVIOUSLY VIEWED SHOWS: MONDAY: From 11/06/01 - Show #1702: Billy Crystal and Britney Spears TUESDAY: From 10/16/01 - Show #1692: Jack Hanna; Justin Long; and the singing police officer, Daniel Rodriguez. WEDNESDAY: From 11/09/01 - Show #1705: CBS Mailbag; Richard Dreyfuss; and Brett Butler. THURSDAY: From 11/20/01 - Show #1712: Julia Roberts; and Shelby Lynne. FRIDAY: From 10/30/01 - Show #1697: David Spade; Marv Albert; and Laurie Anderson. Before watching the repeats, check out the Wahoo Archi... oops. Nevermind. Julia Stiles; and Jeff Gordon. PLUS: Stump the Band; the Oprah Log; What's New In The New Oprah Magazine. STUMP THE BAND: property of Carson Productions. Dave goes into the audience, audience members have a song in their hearts, and then we ask Paul and the band if they know the song? Dave asks Paul if he is ready and we cut to see Paul in the Carnac hat. Paul puts an envelope up to his head and says, "Soccer, Bowling, Osama bin Laden." Paul rips open the envelope and blows into it to give clear passage. Unfortunately, Paul blew the envelope out of his hand. Finding a blue card nearby, Paul reads the question that was inside the envelope: "Name two balls and a dick." 1. David Itamiller of Mitchell, South Dakota, Talk of the Corn Palace. Didn't our George Clarke go to the Corn Palace in his "Quest for Corn"? I was going to ask George but I kind of remember that whole "Quest" to be a sore subject to George, so I decided to skip it. David Itamiller's song: If You Weren't Dutch. Paul gave a hearty attempt but did not know the song. The best part of this whole thing was watching the guy in front of Itamiller checking himself out in the monitor. He seemed impressed. 2. Debbie Busch of Seminole, Florida: Tampa Bay Buccaneer talk. How they doing? Debbie says, "I wish they were doing better." Dave follows this with, "Isn't that always the story with the Tampa Bay Buccaneers?" Debbie works at the Home Depot, which prompts Dave to inquire about some paneling. Debbie's song: I Love The Mountains. I just knew Paul was going to play off the Alicia Bridges song, I Love the Nightlife. Paul did not know the song. Debbie lives in the flattest state in the country and her song is I Love The Mountains? 3. Buddy Angel of Dallas, Texas: A used-car salesman, and yet, he looks honest. Go figure. Buddy's song: I Won't Go Huntin' With You, Jake. Will Lee takes a shot at the song and although he did not come up with the right song, I enjoyed it more than Buddy's. QUEST TO GUEST: OPRAH LOG: DAY 22: Has she called yet? Dave promises to buy Oprah a used car from Buddy Angel if she agrees to have him on the show. Dave phones Art and learns Oprah had not called. Today's entry: "Did not hear from Oprah." This Oprah thing is really getting Dave down. He's been getting a lot of responses, just not from Oprah. He's heard from Connie and Maury Chung, everybody but Oprah. Dave's becoming crestfallen. Paul sings It Ain't Oprah 'Til It's Oprah but I'm not sure if it helped much. Dave is sad. Did you happen to see what's in the new Oprah magazine? It's a guide entitled, "Not Giving Up Hope." Dave exclaims, "Oprah has given me hope to being on Oprah!" It is filled with inspirational quotes. This from comic dramatist, Terence: "While there's life, there's hope." And this from Mahatma Gandhi: "We must be the change we wish to see in the world." Hey, you can't go wrong taking advice from Gandhi and Terence. It seems Dave found new life. Says Dave, "There ain't an ounce of quit in this kid." JULIA STILES: She's not attending the college she's attending. That's about all I got out of the interview. That's no fault of Julia's, I just got vacation on the mind. Dave and Julia talked about the Polar Bear Club, her so-called studies, and her hopes of becoming an actress after graduating. Julia appears in *The Business of Strangers* which opens in selected cities Friday December 7th. JEFF GORDON: He's 30 and he's won the NASCAR Winston Cup 4 times already. I never thought I would say this but I'm beginning to pick up and enjoy the auto racing interviews. I'm getting to know the sport. My brother-in-law John is a big NASCAR fan and he told me a lot of NASCAR fans don't like Gordon that much. This surprised me since he seems great whenever he's on the show. My bro-in-law says it's because Gordon wins all the time, is real young, and "hasn't paid his dues," whatever that means. Since I've been following the CART circuit and Team Rahal for a few years now, I saw this as a topic of conversation for me and my brother-in-law John. I'm not much the conversationalist so I latch on to anything I can. I saw my John a few weeks ago and mentioned how Kenny Brack came in 2nd behind Gil de Ferran in the CART championships. I was looking forward to his insights as to how Brack faltered and de Ferran came on the final few weeks of the season. I knew Brack was in trouble near the end of the season when, trailing de Ferran by 8 points, he had only two races left and only one of them on an oval. John says, "I don't follow the CART." Oh well, I took a shot. I guess it's back to our usual conversation of, "Another beer, John?" And that was our show for Thursday November 29, 2001. Unfortunately, we ran out of time for the musical group Cake. They sounded great during rehearsal. Their new CD is called *Comfort Eagle. After we get Osama, Disney wants to buy Afghanistan and turn it into a new tourist attraction called, "Cave Town." The final note on the Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer* Herbie/Hermey controversy: From Nolan Clinard of High Point, North Carolina "From http://www.tvparty.com/xmasrudolph.html - 'One thing I should make clear is that the elf who wants to be a dentist is named Hermey, Why everyone is calling him 'Herbie'? I will never fully understand. Maybe one day someone will correct the error because it is simply not right to change a character's name that has become a television icon.' This is from someone who worked on the show. There you have it - right from the horse's mouth." The reason there is a controversy is because early in the Rudolph show, the head elf CLEARLY calls the dentist elf by the name "Herbie." Two and a half hour commute this morning. An hour and a half to get on to the George Washington Bridge and then they have the nerve to charge you for it. I wish the New York/New Jersey Port Authority ran their business like Dominoes Pizza - if it takes longer than a half-hour, it's free. Hey, don't go anywhere. Here comes Friday's Wahoo today! And with a detailed CBS Mailbag, answers and everything! Friday, November 30, 2001 / Show #1720 Jada Pinkett Smith; Thomas Friedman; and a quick hello from Eddie Brill. PLUS: CBS Mailbag; Day 23 of the Oprah Log; bin Laden's Mountain Fortress; and a Top Ten List. QUEST TO GUEST: Oprah Log: Day 23 - "Did not hear from Oprah" Dave continues to get discouraged by the silence of Oprah. He says, "It's no longer a joke." At the beginning, the Oprah Log was filled with titters and giggles but it's now gone on too long. Dave looks directly into the camera and says to Oprah, "Oprah, let me tell you something. During last year's election, do you remember how the nation felt when it was filled with uncertainty? The nation was torn apart." The same seems to be happening now. Oprah, please call. Dave can barely find the energy to cue Paul's ode, It Ain't Oprah 'Til It's Oprah. Thank goodness we're going on vacation. The whole staff is humming that damn It Ain't Oprah song. CBS MAILBAG LETTER #1: From Carrie Palmer of Iowa City, Iowa: "Dear Dave, Have you seen Dick Cheney lately?" Dave hasn't seen him but did find an old photograph of Dick. He cut to a shot of Dick Cheney's 3rd grade class. Cheney is near the middle of the class of 3rd graders, looking much like he does today. Cue card master Tony Mendez mumbles loud enough for Dave to hear, "I don't get it." Dave has to explain the joke. "See, he looked the same in 3rd grade as he does now." What's that saying about having to explain a joke? LETTER #2: From Steve Gordon of San Diego, California: "Dear Dave, Why does Biff do that thing with the pushpins?" Dave answers, "Well Steve, go outside and take a look." We cut to Steve in his living room in San Diego. Steve is confused, "'Go outside and take a look?' What does that mean?" Steve opens the front door and looks out. His eyes widen as he sees a giant pushpin sticking into the ground just outside his house. Biff's huge head enters as he laughs his maniacal laugh. And now a peek behind the scenes at the Late Show. The shot of the homes of which the giant Biff rises behind were fake. They were merely small models. The sharp-eyed Late Show viewer would have realized this since "Steve" was from San Diego and the homes in the shot had Frazier Firs on the front lawn. LETTER #3: From Bill Osman of Jefferson City, Missouri: "Dear Dave, Who turns out the lights in the theater after everyone goes home?" That would be Harold, Dave tells us. Dave directs our attention to Harold who happens to be back stage. Harold says, "The lights in the Ed Sullivan Theater are controlled by a complex computer system that's very difficult to operate." How about a demonstration? "Sure," says Harold. He proceeds to pick up a baseball bat and smash all the lights. And now another peek behind the scene of the Late Show. The Harold letter was done LIVE right by the shack backstage. Some months ago, Biff did a piece LIVE in the same location. During that show, Barbara Gaines and I were caught on camera in the corner of your TV screen. This time, I reminded all concerned to keep the background free and clear during this piece. LETTER #4: From Matt Tillman of Seattle, Washington: "Dear Dave, Do you think Osama bin Laden will ever be caught?" Dave admits that to be a very tough question. Here to give an update is 4-Star General William Delace. The General enters. He says, "The search for Osama bin Laden continues. And with the holidays coming, we're not the only ones looking for him. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Santa Claus." Santa enters. "Hello, everybody. It's me, Santa Claus. I'd like to address Osama bin Laden if I may. Osama, I've got all kinds of wonderful toys, gifts and candy for you. But I have no idea how to find you. You're making Santa very, very sad." The General takes over. "You wouldn't want to make Santa Claus sad now would you, Osama? To avoid missing out on all your presents, send you exact coordinates of your cave to: Santa Claus, care of the U.S. Khanabad Military Base in Karshi, Uzbekistan. And come Christmas Eve, Santa's gonna use his state of the art high precision satellite guidance system to drop those presents right down your damn chimney. Merry Christmas, Osama." I think this'll work. Top Ten: Questions On The Application for Doorman At Osama bin Laden's Cave Complex #8. "You're not taking this job so you can kill Osama and get the $25 million, are you?" #6. "List three references who can vouch for your beard." JADA PINKETT SMITH: Dressed in all black. Jada is appearing in the Christmas Day release of the film, *Ali. It'll be hard to do such a great subject justice. I hope it succeeds. Will Smith* plays Muhammad Ali. Jon Voight plays Howard Cosell. Didn't Voight just get finished playing FDR? Dave and Jada talked about making biscuits. "If you want them soft and fluffy," says Jada, "you have to knead the dough gently." I'm on vacation as soon as I'm done typing this. I'm cutting everything short. Hope you understand. THOMAS FRIEDMAN: Sometimes when you watch this show, you can learn something. Thomas Friedman is a two-time Pulitzer Prize winning journalist, a best-selling author, and the foreign affairs columnist for The New York Times. He had some very interesting things to say about the Mid-East and Afghanistan, stuff you can use at cocktail parties during the holidays. "The people of many of these countries blame us (U.S.) for their bad governments." "The will not be over until we get Osama dead or dead." "War doesn't solve anything, but guess what, neither does social work." "Saddam is next. He has to start abiding by the United Nations demand on weapons inspections." Three ACTS with Thomas. Lots of good information. EDDIE BRILL: We ran out of time for comedian Eddie Brill. Eddie will be appearing at the Skyline Comedy Café in Appleton, Wisconsin, December 5th through the 8th. He also touted a comedy CD called, *Comics Come Home VI* to support the Cam Nealy cancer foundation. And that was our show for Friday November 30, 2001. NEXT WEEK'S PREVIOUSLY VIEWED SHOWS: MONDAY: From 11/06/01 - Show #1702: Billy Crystal and Britney Spears TUESDAY: From 10/16/01 - Show #1692: Jack Hanna; Justin Long; and the singing police officer, Daniel Rodriguez. WEDNESDAY: From 11/09/01 - Show #1705: CBS Mailbag; Richard Dreyfuss; and Brett Butler. THURSDAY: From 11/20/01 - Show #1712: Julia Roberts; and Shelby Lynne. FRIDAY: From 10/30/01 - Show #1697: David Spade; Marv Albert; and Laurie Anderson. Before watching the repeats, check out the Wahoo Archi... oops. Nevermind.


			Contact Michael

Send to a friend

Advertisement