Jill Bakken and Vonetta Flowers are the gold medal winners in the women's two-man bobsleigh. Or is it women's two-man bobsled? Or the two-woman bobsleigh or two-woman bobsled. Bobsled? Bobsleigh? Two-man? Two-woman? Which is it? Says Dave, "Hey, I ain't exactly Curt Gowdy!" I like the old references. I get 'em.

Before getting to the meat of the ACT 1, Dave quickly talks about his drinking days and how he loved just about everything about them. I always enjoy his reminiscence of his drinking days. Sounds familiar to me.

Our new mayor Michael Bloomberg has been receiving some bad publicity for going away on weekends and not telling anybody where he is going. When the Mayor is away, we have a Deputy Mayor who takes over. It's a little-known position with most New Yorkers having no idea who it is. There was a photo in Sunday's New York Post of the Deputy Mayor in charge. Dave holds up a photo of an unshaven, unkempt, sloppily-attired, pigeon-toed Marc Shaw. I had to laugh at the photo. It's exactly what I look like every weekend.

OLYMPICS QUIZ:
- A guy in front of 4 large containers:
"This vendor has made a fortune selling:
A) coffee
B) hot chocolate
C) clean urine.

- Old man in red jacket:
"Savvy spectators recognized this man as:
A) a famous hockey coach
B) a well-known Canadian broadcaster
C) Olympic legend Bob Sled." (This sounded very familiar, so I went back to an old Olympic Chyron quiz - I didn't find it)

- Heavy guy wearing a USA sweater:
"This man lives by the motto:
A) Don't tread on me
B) God Bless America
C) These colors don't exercise

- Bald man alone:
"This athlete left town because:
A) he needed time to reflect
B) He's psyching himself up for his event
C) He tested positive for Rogaine

Fat men and bald men are both fair game in comedy.

TOP TEN: Ways New York City is Different When This Guy's in Charge (we show a photo of the deputy mayor)
#8. Always unavailable when "Springer" is on.
#4. Schools closed on George Thorogood's birthday
#1. First city official since Koch to take a leak in the Hudson

JILL BAKKEN AND VONETTA FLOWERS: Gold medal winners in the women's bobsled. - Jill is 25 and started bobsledding at the age of 17. She went to Lake Placid, New York and gave it a shot. Anybody could have done it. Jill was 17 eight years ago so I'm guessing she was inspired after watching the men's bobsleigh in the Lillehammer Olympics. Vonetta is 28. Before she took up the bobsleigh, she was a seven-time All-American in the long jump, the triple jump, and the 100-meter dash. After finishing 13th in the summer Olympic trials in the long jump, she went back to the hotel and found a flyer encouraging track and field athletes to try out for the bobsled. She gave it a shot and here she is.
Dave asked the Gold medalists if the bobsleigh generated any down force during the run? Jill answered, "Down force?"
Vonetta is the first black athlete from any country to win a gold medal at a Winter Olympics. The only other African-American to medal in a Winter Olympics was Debbi Thomas, who won a bronze in figure skating in 1988.

KELSEY GRAMMER: Between "Cheers" and "Frasier" Kelsey has portrayed TV's Frasier Crane for 18 years. Dave has portrayed TV's David Letterman for over 20 years. Kelsey wants to portray Frasier for at least another two years so to break James Arness' record as Marshall Dillon on "Gunsmoke." "Gunsmoke" was a western. "Frasier" is a northwestern. For some reason I rarely get to watch "Frasier" but enjoy it whenever I do. I'm glad I don't watch it much because I'll be able to watch "new" episodes in syndication for years to come, like I'm doing now with "Seinfeld."

ALANIS MORISSETTE: Singing "Hands Clean" from her new CD, "Under Rug Swept."

And that was our show for Monday, February 25, 2002. Wahoo Extra!

I have to admit I was kinda rooting for Canada in Sunday's hockey game vs. U.S.A. I mean, after Quebec and Banff, what else do they have?

Bronze medal winner in the Men's 1000 meter speed skating -- Joey Cheek. Isn't he also on "The Sopranos"?

Do you think NBC will have much of a drop off in viewers this week? They're going from Olympic figure skating, hockey, and skiing, to "Fear Factor," "Third Watch," and "Crossing Jordan."

In the television world of all-important ratings where image is everything, is it a good idea to name your TV show, "Third Watch"?

Relax, my friends to the north. I was only kidding about Canada having nothing more than hockey, Quebec and Banff. Hopefully you continued to read before shooting off a hot letter to me. It was a cheap joke looking for a cheap laugh. I know, it's not what you would expect from the Wahoo Gazette. I like Canada. In fact, I'll be rooting for the Expos this year.

Germany won 35 medals, the U.S. 34, and Norway 24. But the biggest winner in these Winter Games? Roots. What is "Roots"?

This from their website:

"Roots was established in Toronto in 1973 and has become an international lifestyle brand at the forefront of development, design and manufacture of modern athletic activewear. The company has over 200 retail stores in 6 countries and two state of the art production facilities in Toronto.

Roots is proud to have developed team outfits for the American, Canadian and British Olympic Teams for the 2002 Winter Olympic Games in Salt Lake City.

The Roots motto, 'Quality, Integrity, Longevity,' mirrors the Olympic ideals Higher, Faster, Stronger and their commitment to excellence."

I thought the Roots motto was "Roots: The name is on our jackets, on our hats, on our gloves."

Commercialism - the official sponsor of the 2002 Winter Olympics.

Why was I rooting for Canada? Because it meant more to them than it did to us. If the USA won, we would remember the feeling until Wednesday evening. In Canada, I expect the feeling of winning the hockey gold will remain with them for years to come.

Although I was rooting for Canada, I was rooting more for the winning goal to be scored during a commercial.

Canadian Late Show staffers: Paul Shaffer (music director) and Chris Moloney (research).