I wrote Friday's Wahoo and forgot to send it to Walter and Jay before the weekend. If you missed it and want to read it, check out the Archives. Yes, the Wahoo has Archives.

Monday after the show was the big staff photo shoot. Last year we took the picture on the roof of the Ed Sullivan Theater and we did it again this year. The first few years at CBS we had the photo taken on stage. Then for a year or two we had it taken on 53rd Street. Now it looks as if the roof is the place for the next few years. It offers a nice background.
Dave phones Stephanie to have her go up to the roof to get herself a good spot for the shot. That was Dave's plan but he ran in to some trouble with the dialing. I'm telling you, the push button isn't as easy as it looks. I don't know why we had to change from the rotary. I never had any trouble with it. Dave ends up breaking the telephone but manages to compensate and gets the call through. We learn that Stephanie went to a wedding this weekend to see her close friend Newman become wedded. Dave wants to know if there was any horseplay? Any grab ass? If she got 'faced.'" I think the answers were Yes, Yes, and No. Is Stephanie married? She gives an emphatic NO! Dave thinks she should find a happenin' guy and get married. Stephanie describes herself as a bit of a dud and things don't look promising at the moment. Don't let her fool you. Stephanie is a happenin' lady and knows what she's doing. When she wants to get married, she'll get married. She's a single gal in New York City. That's a pretty good deal.

BASEBALL STRIKE: What the Owners are saying/What the Players are saying.
Here's what I'm saying: GO ON STRIKE, PLEASE! A full season could not possibly be more entertaining than a strike right now. Oh, the venom spewed on the radio talk shows would be so delicious. What fun that will be. And the best part about it will be that no one - the players, the owners, the radio hosts, or the fans - will know why the players are striking. Revenue sharing? Luxury tax? These are reasons to go on strike? Please go on strike. I'll be sitting by the radio all weekend, laughing all the way.

I don't get emotionally involved in the sports anymore. For me, it's all about entertaining me. A baseball strike would be very entertaining.

The Owners Say: "Baseball will have to cut unprofitable teams."
The Players Say: "Keep the Expos so we can buy cheap cigarettes in Montreal."

The Owners Say: "We need to freeze outrageous salaries."
The Players Say: "We need to stop freezing dead Hall of Famers."

Dave skipped one along the way. He jumped one to go to the last. What did he skip? Only in the Wahoo Gazette:
The Players Say: "If you bring in scab players, you'll destroy the game."
The Owners Say: "They can't be any worse than the Devil Rays."

During the bit, we find a lone Stephanie on the roof of the Ed awaiting the staff photo.

Back from commercial, we see smoke billowing throughout the stage. What is it? Oh, nothing. We're just spraying for the West Nile mosquitoes.

STUPID HUMAN TRICKS
#1. Krysten Peek from Monument Colorado. Her trick? She can balance a can of coke on her forehead, drop it down, and catch it with her teeth. I was impressed. It looks like any of us could learn it but I'm afraid of the potential damage to my teeth. Why don't you try it at home and let me know how you did.
#2. Paul Menhaya from Champagne, Illinois: What can Paul do? He can split an apple with his finger. Paul places the apple down, put his index finger across the top of it, then smashes down on his finger with his other fist, "splitting" the apple, or more like smashing it. Obviously, the one finger had little to do with the splitting of the apple. It was the slamming fist that did the job. (The Slamming Fist - great band.) I sort of Played the Dave when I said, "Hey, good for him. He fooled somebody into thinking that was a trick. Dave explained to Paul that the finger didn't split the apple, the fist did. He then mumbles how the kid managed to get airfare to New York City out of the Late Show for this trick.
#3. Joel Freeborn from Wauwatosa, Wisconsin: His trick: He can open a bottle of beer with his belly button. Joel unbuttons his shirt, places the top of the beer bottle securely in his belly button, then scrunches then twists the bottle leaving the cap in his belly button. It was a great trick with great visuals. I can only imagine all the cut belly buttons on college campuses across America this week.

And that was Stupid Human Tricks.

JIMMY FALLON: Stars on TV's "Saturday Night Live"; will host the MTV Video Music Awards this Thursday night, and he has a music CD that's about to come out. Plus, he owns a minor league baseball team. Plus he knows Wynona. And that's not all. Jimmy Fallon does a great Jack Nicholson and Woody Allen impression. I particularly enjoyed his Jack Nicholson talking about the prizes in Cracker Jacks. Jack told Jimmy how when he was a kid you got metal things like whistles and magnifying glasses. These days, it's pictures of a snake on a piece of paper. And they call this progress?

DIRTY VEGAS: From their debut CD, "Dirty Vegas," they sang "Simple Things." As with most musical groups on the show, I never heard of them. All day I was calling them "Dirty Vegas" - Vegas like Las Vegas. Reading the intro, I saw they were from England and wondered if it wasn't Vegas like Las Vegas but maybe Vegas like the plural for the car, the Vega, so the S would sound more like a Z. I asked someone in the music department if it was Vegas like Las Vegas or if it was Vegas, like the car? She says, "Vegas like Las Vegas. The car? What car?" I said, "The Vega, you know, the Vega." She had no idea what a Vega was. Was it really that long ago?

And that was our show for tonight. My Question About Its vs. It's

As I said before, I know the difference and when to use which. I was just wondering about the rule. The following clarified much for me and hopefully for you too.

From Mark S. Nelson

"It's vs. Its is one of the exceptions of grammar. Here is the passage from the greatest writing book ever, 'The Elements of Style' by Strunk and White.
'The pronominal possessive hers, its, theirs, yours, and ours have no apostrophe. Indefinite pronouns, however, use the apostrophe to show possession.
one's rights
somebody else's umbrella
A common error is too write it's for its, or vice versa. The first is a contraction, meaning 'it is.' The second is a possesive.
It's a wise dog that scratches its own fleas.

Steven Bevier of East Lansing, MI

"Its" is not just the possessive from of "it," it is also a special kind of word. "Its" is a possessive pronoun, like "his," "hers," "theirs" and "ours."
"Its" is to "it" what "his" is to "he."

Roz Cundell from NYC

You must be kidding about your "its-it's" confusion. You strike me as a very grammatical guy considering that the Wahoo is never proofread. So, here's the scoop (as if you didn't know). "Its" is possessive (and jealous, I hear). After all it's (see that?) "his" and "hers" and "ours"--not "hi's" and "her's" and "our's."

Rob Carlisle, Arlington, VA:

"It's is not, it isn't ain't, and it's it's, not its, if you mean it is. If you don't, it's its. Then too, it's hers. It isn't her's. It isn't our's either. It's ours, and likewise yours and theirs." --Oxford University Press, Edpress News

I think that explains it all. Wahoo EXTRA!

SNAPPLE UNDER THE CAP FUN FACT OF THE DAY:
#40. "It is possible to lead a cow up stairs but not down stairs."

DAMMIT! NOW THEY TELL ME!

For those wondering, Tony the Cue Card Master is fine. He's a strong Union man and refuses to cross the Major League Baseball Players picket line. He'll be back once this baseball thing is settled.

CAMEO MENTION OF A NON-WAHOO READER - It's my attempt to bring non-Wahoo readers into the Wahoo fold.
Name: Alan Page City: San Francisco A Google search produced:
Professor of Anthropology from the University of California, it's Alan Page Fiske.
This concludes another episode of CAMEO MENTION OF A NON-WAHOO READER

We had the staff photo today taken on the roof of the Ed Sullivan Theater. Check out the Tony Mendez Show for a look behind the scenes.

In case you're wondering: I am in 5th place in Fantasy baseball league, 2 points out of 3rd (a money spot). I've been scrounging around in 7-8 most of the year. With a lot of luck, I may be in 3rd by Friday. I would love to be in 3rd place just one day the whole year, then baseball goes on strike. I'll keep you posted. It's not about winning and losing, it's all about the money.