Up first tonight, Andre Barrett on the roof of the Ed Sullivan Theater. Andre will be attempting to drop stuff off the roof through a basketball hoop on 53rd Street. Distance: 90 feet.
Andre Barrett is a senior and a 4-year starting guard for the Seton Hall University Pirates. He was named first team, All-Big East and is one of only two players in Seton Hall history with over 1,000 points and more than 500 career assists. Andre is a career 77% free throw shooter; 42% from the field.
Before we begin, we first take a look at our own Pat Farmer from March 14, 2001 making a basket on his very first attempt from the roof. So, yes, it can be done.
But Andre will not be throwing a basketball. We have other items in mind.
The first item off the roof: a bottle of champagne.
The weather conditions: 44 degrees; humidity 28%; barometric pressure 30.31 inches and falling; wind from the southwest at 8 mph, with gusts up to 22 mph; and visibility at 10 miles.
Andre drops the champagne and it falls just a bit short. No good. We will check in again later with Andre for the next item.

GEORGE W. BUSH TO THE MAX! It’s new, it’s exciting, it’s George W. Bush – To The Max!
We see the President giving a speech to . . somebody. He says “AP means raising the bar, is what it means. It means challenging students . . . (with gusto) . . . TO THE MAX!”

Back to Andre. The next item: a jar of mayonnaise. Dave asks Andre if he learned anything from his first toss. He says the wind took it a little short. Dave wonders if he has ever practiced with canned goods before. Don’t think so. Andre is ready with the mayo and lets it fly. It looked good from the release and again it came up short, but this time it was much closer. You can tell the Big East All Star is zeroing in on the target. Next will be a giant ball of pizza dough. The item strikes a familiar cord with Dave, saying about the giant ball of pizza dough, “In fact, that was my nickname in college.”

Have you been following this story of Senator John Kerry being under a year’s surveillance by the FBI in the early 70s due to this involvement in anti-war activities? The FBI came out with this statement.

“We at the FBI would like to acknowledge that beginning in 1971 we did in fact closely monitor John Kerry.”
(see photo of Kerry from early 70s)
“We compiled a nearly 20,000 page report on all his activities, including his involvement in the anti-war movement.”
(see more photos of Kerry from that time)
“We also kept a file on George W. Bush. Here’s all we needed to see.”
(see photo of George W. Bush as a cheerleader yelling into a megaphone.)
“The FBI. Keeping America safe.”

GEORGE W. BUSH PRETENDS TO BE INTERESTED.
The President is in an auditorium listening to a presentation from a business owner describing the origins of his company. The businessman says, “He came to Bakersfield with his sons Don and Jerry. And they went to work. And they sold old junky stuff. Bought and sold. And then they got an irrigation business and started renting sprinkler systems to people. And we got the name ‘Rain for Rent.’ That’s where it came from.”
The President nods his head, feigning fascination.

To close up the 1st ACT, Andre throws off a one-gallon can of yellow paint. Andre looks over the side, aims, and releases. I felt good about it as soon as he dropped it. And it was . . . . . no good! OH, SO CLOSE! The replay shows the paint can hit the back of the rim. Good splatter of the yellow paint onto the theater building. No points scored, but good TV.

Back from commercial, Andre Barrett is now about to drop a jar of jellybeans. The jar of jellybeans is not as big as Dave would like but that’s because at this time of year jellybeans are hard to find. Uhh, I mean big jars are hard to find. Yeah, that’s it. We couldn’t find a big jar.
Andre takes aim with his jar of jellybeans but his aim falls short once again. The All-Big East 1st team player is running out of chances.
Andre’s final throw will be one of those big blue 5-gallon water jugs.

TOP TEN: sponsored by My-Head-Hurts.com.
Surprises In John Kerry’s FBI Files.
#9. Has experimented with drugs, alcohol and botox.
#7. Belonged to an exclusive secret society called The Columbia Record and Tape Club
#6. He used to be Joan Kerry.

Andre Barrett, star cager from Seton Hall, is ready with the 5-gallon jug of water. Dave calls Andre the “go to” guy in the clutch and with the game on the line with one shot remaining, Andre usually gets the call. “Isn’t that right, Andre?” Andre answers, “Yeah, but I never sunk a jug before.” Never mind that, we got a game to win. Andre balances the blue 5-gallon jug of water on the ledge and heaves it over the side. It looked real good flying through the air. And it’s . . . . . . I DON’T KNOW! It’s so close we have to go to the overhead instant replay. In slow motion we see the 5-gallon jug hit the backboard and go astray. NO GOOD! Dang, it was close though. Nice shot! And a decent way to end the piece.

Good work by Andre Barrett.

I don’t know if it’s coincidence or if it is done by design, but when we throw stuff off the roof, we often end with those big 5-gallon jugs of water. My guess is we do this because it helps in the cleanup. The more gallons thrown over board, the more the mess is washed away.

JAMIE FOXX: Jamie’s been working and living in Australia for the past month and a half and he’s really taken by it. It’s as if he’s surrounded by 20,000 Crocodile Dundees. Oh, and they like their beer, too. He spent some time watching the Formula 1 Grand Prix and was very impressed with the Ferraris. Lots of dough goes into the Ferrari cars. The Hondas? Not so. Even to the untrained eye Jamie was able to see the difference.

I’ve been to most sporting events but I’ve yet to see an auto race. Do they still have a racetrack in Englishtown, New Jersey?

Jamie recently worked with Tom Cruise, a real Mr. Smooth. Jamie says the Cruise can talk you into anything. His seductive eyes and voice really works on you. You can say, “I can’t do this. I don’t want to do this.” And Tom Cruise will say, “Yes, you can, Jamie. Do it. You want to do it.” And before you know it, Jamie’s saying “You know, I think I do want to do this.” Oh how I would love to see Tom Cruise try this on his kids.
“C’mon, kids, you want to go to bed now. Yes you do.”
I don’t see this working.

Jamie Foxx will be appearing in the film, Redemption, on the FX network on April 11th. It’s based on a true story of one of the founders of the Crips gang. Convicted of 4 murders, he spends 6 years in solitary confinement. He rejected gang life and ended up doing what he always wanted to do: write children’s books. So successful were the books, that he was nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize and a Nobel Prize for Literature.

AL FRANKEN: Al had some trouble a few months back in New Hampshire. While attending a Howard Dean rally, a heckler got up and began what hecklers do: he heckled. And he continued to heckle to the point of preventing Howard Dean from speaking and being heard. Dean’s security personnel approached the heckler but, according to Al Franken, the security team was too “skinny and nice.” Al took matters into his own hands. As the heckler approached Mr. Dean, Al used the knowledge he picked up in high school wrestling and “interrupted” the man’s approach. The heckler was then kindly escorted off the premises to the outdoors, where he continued to demonstrate and protest, “as is his right.”

Al Franken is about to embark on a new career, that of radio talk show host. On the new Air America Radio Network, Al will host his very own “The O’Franken Factor” program. It debuts Wednesday, March 31st. In New York, it’ll be up against Rush Limbaugh’s show. But why “The O’Franken Factor” when Al’s name is Franken and not O’Franken? Al acknowledges it’s a dig at the Bill O’Reilly of the no spin zone Fox TV show. O’Reilly also has a radio program. The two don’t quite get along. They have their differences. Al says one big difference is that Bill O’Reilly is a liar and Al Franken tells the truth. Would Bill O’Reilly come on Al’s show? Al says he’s invited O’Reilly but he’s afraid to come into the Zero Spin Zone. How is O’Reilly a liar? Al says for one thing, Bill claims no one grew up lower on the socio-economic ladder than he. Al points out that O’Reilly grew up on Long Island and went to private schools most his life. Al says the kids growing up in the South Bronx may have something to say about the low lifestyle of Bill O’Reilly’s upbringing. You can tell Al Franken likes to bait Mr. O’Reilly. Does Franken bait Rush Limbaugh? No, not really. He says it’s no fun baiting Limbaugh because he doesn’t go for the bait. Bill then does an impersonation of Rush Limbaugh, which he may use on his radio program during his commercial reads.

"The O’Franken Factor" – premieres March 31st – look for it in your local listings.

ACT 5: It’s the throwing of the yellow paint can shown in reverse.

And that was our show for Tuesday March 23rd. Dave gives good marks to all involved and awards Andre Barrett as the show’s MVP. It’s another honor Andre can display on his mantle.
Congratulations, Andre. Wahoo EXTRA!

This past weekend I went to the Ed tag sale. No, the Ed Sullivan Theater did not have a tag sale. I went to the tag sale by now defunct Worldwide Pants TV show Ed. It was held at the Stuckeybowl Bowling alley two miles from my house. If I had a junk room in my home and if I had a pocket full of junk money, I may have bought some of the Ed junk. One word came to mind as I browsed throughout the props department and garage: dusty. By the time I got there, all the good stuff was auctioned off the week before, that is if you consider bowling pins and neon signs good stuff. I did see “Rock ‘em Sock ‘em Robots” which I considered purchasing. When I finally decided I wanted it, I went back to pick it up and found it was gone. Oooh, I got so angry. I finally decide to get something and it’s gone. I know, I know, I know. Garage sale aficionados tell me to never think of what could have been. Once it’s gone, it’s gone. I need to let it go. It’s a learning experience. But if you really want something, get it while you can because you can guarantee it’ll be gone when you go back. I learned an important lesson and it cost me a “Rock ‘em Sock ‘em Robots.”

But I had to buy something, or else it would be a wasted trip.

So I went back around and decided on two desk-chairs, the kind you’d find in a Catholic School elementary class. You know the kind that has a place for your books underneath the seat and the desk part attached to an arm coming from the seat, all one piece. And the desk part has an engraved, etched in the desk pencil rest at the top. For the first two days since I brought them home, my girls have` run to their special desks to do their homework right after school. Now if they can only sustain that enthusiasm for their desks for another 10 years it’ll be a darn good purchase. Well worth the money.

So I’m driving home Tuesday night and on the radio is My Baby Does the Hanky Panky, 18 hours after it’s played on the LATE SHOW for Tom Hanks. Coincidence, or is somebody on the radio watching the LATE SHOW? Uhhh, probably a coincidence.

In yesterday’s Wahoo, I asked:

“My question about electric cars: isn’t there an energy shortage in California, as well as the rest of the country? If everyone had electric cars instead of the combustible engine, wouldn’t that put a ridiculous strain on our power supply?”

”re: electric cars. If they were recharged at night it would make more efficient use of the electricity generation system. Also the world would need less energy to refine and transport oil. And environmental clean-up systems could be concentrated at the power stations rather than every car needing a catalytic converter. And if we turned oil into recyclable plastics rather than burning it we'd help the environment. And if each house had a wind farm and solar energy we could recharge our cars from that. And if Americans recharged their electric cars using exercise bicycles that would solve the obesity problem (also a problem in Europe).”