It's America's Fastest Growing Party Sensation, it's Audience Show and Tell.
AST #1: Heather Donohue of Upper Montclair, New Jersey. Heather is a self-employed craft maker. Dave notices Heather's necklace and asks, "How would you describe that necklace?" Heather deadpans, "Crafty." Dave follows with, "And how much would I pay if I wanted one of those?" Heather answers, "For you . . . comp." Dave presses on. She responds, "$15, maybe more after the publicity from this appearance." At first I thought Heather was a bit of a dud but soon realized she's funny with an arid/parched/desert dry sense of humor. She had me smiling.
What does Heather have to show or tell? Heather has a photo of her with Martha Stewart at Martha's home in Connecticut. Heather once worked with Ms. Stewart. Dave suggests that now that Martha is going to prison, Heather can elbow in and take over her empire.

AST #2: Michael Morgenthal, from New York: Michael is a freelance writer. What's he got for us? He was a Pampers baby. He appeared in a Pampers commercial many years ago. Dave asks, "Why did you give up the diaper work?" They laugh. Under the laughter, Michael says, "Who says I have?"
We see a wee-little Michael on the front of a bicycle. Somehow this was supposed to sell Pampers. Nice going, Michael. It must look great on your resume.

AST #3: Annie Petersmeyer of Los Altos, California. She's a student. What can Annie tell us about Los Altos? What does Los Altos mean? Nobody seems to know. Dave tries to help out, saying it has something to do with hills. Annie offers little help, obviously here just to show her talent, not to educate the audience.
What can Annie do? She can do 10 push-ups with her legs resting on her elbows. Annie gets herself into a pretzel position and manages 10 push-ups. No, thank you, I won't even try.
Dave aptly describes is as a great way to make friends.

GEORGE W. BUSH PRESIDENTIAL COUGH: We see the President finishing up his speech: "May God bless Mexico, and may God continue to bless the United States of America." He looks into the audience accepting their applause . . . then coughs right into the microphone. Cover your mouth, Mr. President!

WILL IT FLOAT?
Dave asks Alan, "Alan, what are we playing for tonight?" Alan announces what we will be dropping into the Will It Float tank: "20 pounds of Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough." Dave and Paul both agree that isn't much of a prize. Dave was looking for the prize to be won, not the item to be dropped. We start again, back-tracking to a few moments prior to the error, talking about the Home Game. The cue cards for Alan are reshuffled so the prize item is on top. Dave looks over to Alan and says, "Alan, tell us the item we are floating tonight." Alan stops, looks, and waits for the cue card guy to unshuffle his cards back to the original position. Alan announced, "20 pounds of Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough." Boy oh boy, that Mr. Letterman makes me laugh. Does it float? Does it sink? It sinks. I would have won if I played.

TOP TEN: Pieces of Advice I Gave My Celebrity Child.
Assisting tonight, ten celebrities' moms.
#10. Lance Armstrong's mom, Linda
#9. Stephon Marbury's mom, Mable
#8. Liv Tyler's mom, Bebe
#7. Avril Lavigne's mom, Judy
#6. Jimmy Fallon's mom, Gloria
#5. The mother of Carson Daly, Pattie.
#4. The mother of Tyra Banks, Carolyn
#3. The mother of Julia Robert, Betty Lou.
#2. Beyonce's mom, Tina
#1. And Dave's mom, Dorothy.

Nice ladies, all. I particularly enjoyed Stephon Marbury's mom's read of "No rice pudding until you perfect the crossover dribble."
#3. Julia Robert's mom - "Save your money, honey, because trust me, beauty fades."

KELSEY GRAMMER: His "Frasier" series finale in Thursday, May 13th. He watched the "Friends" finale last night and explains, "I now understand the excitement of Jennifer Ansiton's hair!"
Kelsey's "Frasier" character is the longest-running character on television, tied with James Arness' Marshall Dillon from the Gunsmoke. Have they gotten together to laugh and congratulate each other for their success? No. Kelsey was on the Today show recently and someone had the idea to invite James Arness on to acknowledge Kelsey tying the record. Arness had no interest in meeting with Kelsey. He doesn't think much of the "Frasier" show either.
I learned something tonight. James Arness's brother is Peter Graves.
Why is the "Frasier" finale on Thursday? Isn't it a Tuesday show? I know NBC wants to keep a strong Thursday lineup but why are they funkying around with the Frasier date? Shouldn't they be loyal to the Tuesday night crowd?
Kelsey Grammer wears a suit very well.
Kelsey had the privilege of taking his mother to meet the President recently. She was very excited. She was a bit shy in meeting the President but GWB put her at east by saying to her, "Now you come over here and take a picture with the President!"
I must admit I haven't seen too many "Frasier" episodes, but certainly more than "Friends." Again, it must be a scheduling thing because I usually find his show to be funny.
Kelsey Grammer and "Frasier" - final show - Thursday May 13.

ON CAPE: On Cape tonight, Betty Lou Roberts.

ORCHESTRA BAOBOB, FEATURING TREY ANASTASIO AND DAVE MATTHEWS: Great song. Watch for the VH-1 documentary premiering Saturday night (tonight) entitled, "Dave and Trey Go To Africa."

And that was our show for Friday, May 7, 2004. Wahoo EXTRA!

We taped the Friday show on Friday again this week. Some weeks we tape two shows on Thursday, the second show for Friday. Next week we split the difference.

So Major League Baseball has nixed the Spider-Man ads on the bases. Not too long ago Major League Baseball hinted they might allow advertising on uniforms but backed down when fans reacted with ire. So the fans have won . . . temporarily. Major League is just softening us up until we give in.

Glance into the future: I was watching a college football game a few months back. The television viewing audience was able to see an advertisement on the football field, the network using the green grass as a chroma. It was invisible to the stadium crowd but through the magic of television, visible to the TV audience. I only saw it once and it was for only a few seconds without mention. Experimenting? Is this where televised sports is headed?

ORCHESTRA BAOBAB - What is a baobab? (pronounced Bow-Bob, bow like cow)
The baobab is probably the best known tree in Africa. Its thick, grey, fibrous trunk (reaching, in some instances, over 43 metres in circumference) and large, spreading crown, seasonably devoid of foliage, are instantly recognizable. Sometimes called the "upside-down tree", because of their unusual, root-like branch formations, baobabs are extremely long-lived, with some specimens believed to be as much as 3,000 years old.

Other facts about the baobab tree.
1. The baobab tree is one of the oldest life-forms in Africa, some as old as 3,000 years old.
2. It is generally found in low altitudes and in the hotter, drier areas of Africa.
3. The baobab tree has a huge trunk which can reach 150 feet in circumference (half a football field)
4. The baobab tree is also known as:

-"The Upside-Down Tree" - because of its unusual, root-like branch formations. -"The Monkey-Bread Tree" - after its edible pulp.

Yesterday I mentioned how much I enjoy reading a review of a really bad play of movie. I reprinted part of the Daily News review of the new play, "Prymate." Today, I offer the New York Post review by Clive Barnes.

FRIED CHIMP
By CLIVE BARNES
May 6, 2004 - PRYMATE - Half a star - At the Longacre Theatre. 220 W. 48th St. (212) 239-6200.
THE 2003/2004 Broadway season officially closed last night with the arrival of Mark Medoff's "Prymate" at the Longacre Theatre.
Apparently, they saved the worst till last.
There have been worse plays on Broadway - "Moose Murders" comes to mind, and something about 35 years ago called "Fire." Or perhaps it was "Fever." Whatever. But "Prymate" - presumably an exposition of the rights of animals as opposed to the rights of human beings, a worthy enough subject - gets no serious discussion in a play as ramshackle and doomed as a grass hut in a hurricane.
The plot gets crazier as it thickens. Suffice it to say that eventually the biter gets bit. "Prymate" is not prime time. And shouldn't it be "Primate"? Unless the title is meant as a pun, as in "prying mate."
If so, the pun is as bad as the play, and almost as silly.