DAVETV If you could look at only one thing on the Internet, DaveTV would be the obvious choice. What other so-called "website" lets you watch LATE SHOW Highlights, Comedy Clips, Slideshows, Stupid Trick clips and The Tony Mendez Show?
TOP TEN LIST You know it, you love it, you can't live without it: the revolutionary comedy bit that won Dave the Nobel Peace Prize. Check out the latest Top Ten List here.
TOP TEN ARCHIVES Old Top Ten Lists never die, they just get archived. The Top Ten Archives is searchable by date and keyword. Also, please note that the word "archives" contains the word "chives."
TOP TEN CONTEST So you think you're as funny as Dave's writers? Or maybe you just enjoy wasting time at work? See if you've got the chops to win a great prize in our weekly Top Ten Contest.
TOP TEN SEARCH Search Results.
TOP TEN SEARCH Search Results.
WAHOO GAZETTE LATE SHOW staffer Mike McIntee gives you a daily show summary and the behind-the-scenes lowdown with his daily Wahoo Gazette. So much juicy inside information that you'll say "Wahoo!"
THE WAHOO GAZETTE ARCHIVE Mike McIntee's popular Wahoo Gazette is archived here in the aptly- named Wahoo Gazette Archive. You can search by date, keyword, or show number, or even Dave's tie pattern (coming June 2012).
THE WAHOO GAZETTE ARCHIVE Mike McIntee's popular Wahoo Gazette is archived here in the aptly- named Wahoo Gazette Archive. You can search by date, keyword, or show number, or even Dave's tie pattern (coming June 2012).
Amanda Peet; Patrick Warburton; and Jeff Caldwell.
PLUS: Jenna Bush and ghosts; depressing jobs; Sue Hum with mac & cheese; Great Moments in Presidential Speeches; Will It Float; and Late Show Fun Facts.
" . . . . and now, the only collection of disco hits you'll ever need . . . . David Letterman!"
ACT 1
Dave laments, "I got a hold of something and it won't leave me alone." He had one of those protein shakes that comes back to "say hello to me every few seconds." It a shake made of fruit and a cup-and-a-half of paint.
There's some interesting news about Jenna Bush that's been revealed. We take a look.
Announce:
(various shots of the White House) "Jenna Bush recently told 'Texas Monthly' that she has heard ghosts while in the White House. Could there really be an evil, ghostly, undead creature wandering the halls of the White House? You betcha. (cut to shot of Dick Cheney) Dick Cheney: Locked and Loaded."
Our costume designer Susan Hum makes an unexpected entrance. She is holding a bowl of something and stands beside Dave.
DAVE: "Hi, Sue."
SUE: "I made macaroni & cheese."
DAVE: "That's great, Sue."
Dave goes on with the show. Sue remains.
DAVE: "Sue, is there something I can help you with?"
SUE: "Everyone loves macaroni & cheese."
DAVE: "Sue, we're right in the middle of a show. Maybe some other time."
SUE: (turning angry) "Don't get cute with me, you Nancy-boy!" She drops the bowl of macaroni & cheese and exits. She points a threatening finger Dave's way as she exits.
A new government report has compiled a list of the most depressing jobs in America. We have a summary of the results here:
(HEY! Wait for the joke!)
Shot of hospital orderly - "Personal care worker"
Shot of fast food worker - "Food preparer"
Shot of receptionist - "Late Show Receptionist"
Shot of researcher - "Late Show Researcher"
More shots of office workers, with the caption:
"Late Show Audience Coordinator"
"Late Show Production Manager"
"Late Show Segment Producer"
"Late Show Art Director"
"Late Show Videotape Editor"
"Late Show Intern"
"Late Show Talent Coordinator"
"Late Show Graphics Artist"
GREAT MOMENTS IN PRESIDENTIAL SPEECHES
I don't know. Something about reading a book.
ACT 2
Dear Mr. Letterman,
Enclosed is the latest batch of Fun Facts compiled by the FBMI for you and your viewers. I hope you enjoy them.
I wish to apologize to any viewers who were confused about a recent announcement on the FBMI website. Unfortunately, the free flu shots are for FBMI staffers only. Sorry for the inconvenience.
Sincerely,
Gary Sherman.
FBMI - Federal Bureau of Miscellaneous Information
And then Dave reads this weeks installment of Late Show Fun Facts.
Someday you'll understand.
ACT 3
AMANDA PEET
Amanda is a mom of an 8 month old baby girl. Ahhh, coming to the Late Show must be like a vacation! Is baby a good sleeper? She gets about 11 hours. Amanda and husband attempted the Ferber method of getting their child to sleep. I'm familiar with this and for Denise and me it worked like a charm, but it is a bit nerve wracking. How it works is when it's time for baby to go to bed, you put the baby down in the crib. You let the baby cry for 5 minutes. You then go in and calm the child without touching him or her. You can speak softly to her, but you cannot touch; you cannot pick up. When baby is quieted after a few minutes, you leave. If baby starts crying again, you let her cry for 7 or 8 minutes, then repeat the above. Do it again and then you let baby cry for 10 minutes. You keep increasing the time away until the baby sleeps. For us, by the third night our twin girls were sleeping throughout the night. But it is agonizing to sit outside their bedroom door listening them cry. It's tough.
Does Amanda sing to her daughter to try to get her to sleep? She doesn't. Dave used to sing to Harry, until one night when Dave said, "OK, Harry, now it's time for a song . . ." and Harry responded, "No song, daddy."
Having a first child is very difficult on a parent. As Dave says, "You make a lot of rookie mistakes."
Amanda's new film, "Martian Child" is summarized on IMBd: "Crushed by the death of his fianc
Amanda Peet; Patrick Warburton; and Jeff Caldwell.
PLUS: Jenna Bush and ghosts; depressing jobs; Sue Hum with mac & cheese; Great Moments in Presidential Speeches; Will It Float; and Late Show Fun Facts.
" . . . . and now, the only collection of disco hits you'll ever need . . . . David Letterman!"
ACT 1
Dave laments, "I got a hold of something and it won't leave me alone." He had one of those protein shakes that comes back to "say hello to me every few seconds." It a shake made of fruit and a cup-and-a-half of paint.
There's some interesting news about Jenna Bush that's been revealed. We take a look.
Announce:
(various shots of the White House) "Jenna Bush recently told 'Texas Monthly' that she has heard ghosts while in the White House. Could there really be an evil, ghostly, undead creature wandering the halls of the White House? You betcha. (cut to shot of Dick Cheney) Dick Cheney: Locked and Loaded."
Our costume designer Susan Hum makes an unexpected entrance. She is holding a bowl of something and stands beside Dave.
DAVE: "Hi, Sue."
SUE: "I made macaroni & cheese."
DAVE: "That's great, Sue."
Dave goes on with the show. Sue remains.
DAVE: "Sue, is there something I can help you with?"
SUE: "Everyone loves macaroni & cheese."
DAVE: "Sue, we're right in the middle of a show. Maybe some other time."
SUE: (turning angry) "Don't get cute with me, you Nancy-boy!" She drops the bowl of macaroni & cheese and exits. She points a threatening finger Dave's way as she exits.
A new government report has compiled a list of the most depressing jobs in America. We have a summary of the results here:
(HEY! Wait for the joke!)
Shot of hospital orderly - "Personal care worker"
Shot of fast food worker - "Food preparer"
Shot of receptionist - "Late Show Receptionist"
Shot of researcher - "Late Show Researcher"
More shots of office workers, with the caption:
"Late Show Audience Coordinator"
"Late Show Production Manager"
"Late Show Segment Producer"
"Late Show Art Director"
"Late Show Videotape Editor"
"Late Show Intern"
"Late Show Talent Coordinator"
"Late Show Graphics Artist"
GREAT MOMENTS IN PRESIDENTIAL SPEECHES
I don't know. Something about reading a book.
ACT 2
Dear Mr. Letterman,
Enclosed is the latest batch of Fun Facts compiled by the FBMI for you and your viewers. I hope you enjoy them.
I wish to apologize to any viewers who were confused about a recent announcement on the FBMI website. Unfortunately, the free flu shots are for FBMI staffers only. Sorry for the inconvenience.
Sincerely,
Gary Sherman.
FBMI - Federal Bureau of Miscellaneous Information
And then Dave reads this weeks installment of Late Show Fun Facts.
Someday you'll understand.
ACT 3
AMANDA PEET
Amanda is a mom of an 8 month old baby girl. Ahhh, coming to the Late Show must be like a vacation! Is baby a good sleeper? She gets about 11 hours. Amanda and husband attempted the Ferber method of getting their child to sleep. I'm familiar with this and for Denise and me it worked like a charm, but it is a bit nerve wracking. How it works is when it's time for baby to go to bed, you put the baby down in the crib. You let the baby cry for 5 minutes. You then go in and calm the child without touching him or her. You can speak softly to her, but you cannot touch; you cannot pick up. When baby is quieted after a few minutes, you leave. If baby starts crying again, you let her cry for 7 or 8 minutes, then repeat the above. Do it again and then you let baby cry for 10 minutes. You keep increasing the time away until the baby sleeps. For us, by the third night our twin girls were sleeping throughout the night. But it is agonizing to sit outside their bedroom door listening them cry. It's tough.
Does Amanda sing to her daughter to try to get her to sleep? She doesn't. Dave used to sing to Harry, until one night when Dave said, "OK, Harry, now it's time for a song . . ." and Harry responded, "No song, daddy."
Having a first child is very difficult on a parent. As Dave says, "You make a lot of rookie mistakes."
Amanda's new film, "Martian Child" is summarized on IMBd: "Crushed by the death of his fianc
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