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WAHOO GAZETTE LATE SHOW staffer Mike McIntee gives you a daily show summary and the behind-the-scenes lowdown with his daily Wahoo Gazette. So much juicy inside information that you'll say "Wahoo!"
THE WAHOO GAZETTE ARCHIVE Mike McIntee's popular Wahoo Gazette is archived here in the aptly- named Wahoo Gazette Archive. You can search by date, keyword, or show number, or even Dave's tie pattern (coming June 2012).
THE WAHOO GAZETTE ARCHIVE Mike McIntee's popular Wahoo Gazette is archived here in the aptly- named Wahoo Gazette Archive. You can search by date, keyword, or show number, or even Dave's tie pattern (coming June 2012).
Jaime Pressly; and Brian Regan. PLUS: Drugged Tapwater; Action News; “Gettin’ Down with Larry King; McCain’s Running Mate; Great Moments in Presidential Speeches; a Top Ten list; Will It Float; and Late Show Fun Facts.
“. . . . and now, your source for clean-burning wood pellets . . . . . David Letterman!”
ACT 1:
As I typed this up on Friday morning, I got a phone call that my daughter wasn’t feeling well. I left and planned on finishing this at home. When I got home, I realized I didn’t bring all that I wanted. I’ll do my best.
Studies of municipal tapwater found that many cities’ water contains traces of several common drugs such as pain relievers and antibiotics. Dave was surprised to see this message. Announce:“Much of America’s tapwater has been found to contain drugs such as ibuprofen, naproxen, carbamazepine, monensin, and sulfamethoxazole.”
(shot of Amy Winehouse) “Thanks, dude!
Amy Winehouse. Leadership America can trust.”
Dave turns to the camera on his left. DAVE: “Coming up next on ‘Action News,’ hear the amazing story of an area blind man and his seeing-eye dog who both shot holes-in-one during the same round of golf! That’s coming up on News Fooooooooorrrrrrrre!”
It’s time now for something we call, “Gettin’ Down with Larry King.”
We see the recent show of Larry King with Janet Jackson. Janet has the unenviable task of trying to teach Larry King to dance.
Now that John McCain has sewn up the Republican nomination, he’s thinking about a running mate. Dave doesn’t know if voters will be pleased by his deliberation. Announce: “John McCain has secured the Republican Presidential nomination and is now considering a running mate. No decision has been made yet, but voters can rest assured that his pick will encompass the wisdom of his former colleague, William Jennings Bryant; the experience of his mentor Woodrow Wilson; and the brilliance of his late friend, Thomas Edison.
John McCain: He’s very old.”
GREAT MOMENTS IN PRESIDENTIAL SPEECHES
Bush – “Yesterday I went to their Caterpillar plant in Illinois where they make . . . . big bulldozers.”
ACT 2: LATE SHOW FUN FACTS – It’s great fun . . . and it’s a fact!
ACT 3: SIGNS YOUR COLLEGE BASKETBALL TEAM IS NOT GOING TO MAKE THE NCAA TOURNAMENT 6. They spend timeouts discussing who will win “American Idol” 4. School’s mascot is a giant asthma inhaler.
JAIME PRESSLY: From NBC’s My Name is Earl and a voice in the new film, Dr. Seuss’s Horton Hears a Who.
Jaime, pronounced Jamie, was born in North Carolina and came from a big family. When she was 13 she secretly sent her photo off to those backpage model searches in teen magazines. When the calls started coming in, her mom tried to get rid of them. Jaime had to tell her not to hang up. Jaime soon found herself on the cover of Teen magazine. (And it’s just that easy!) She and her mom moved to California to pursue her modeling career and she then moved on to Japan. It was quite a bit for a young teen but Jaime has always been very confident and adventurous.
Pressly . . . any relation to Elvis Presley? They spell their name differently but that’s not the end of the story. She was often teased when younger for having the “same” name as The King. Her grandfather would tell the story of a family feud many years ago and half the family changed the spelling of their last name and moved to Tennessee. It sounds like a tall tale but Jaime’s uncle got a photo of her grandfather and a photo of Elvis’s father and put them side-by-side. She swears they were the spitting image; same smile, same teeth, same face; so who knows?
Jaime won an Emmy Award for her work on “My Name is Earl” and the highly acclaimed animated “Horton Hears a Who” opened today. She’s also just completed a book, “It’s Not Necessarily Not the Truth.”
ACT 4:
During the commercial break, Felicia Collins and the CBS Orchestra performed a stirring “If You Don’t Know Me By Now.” Absolutely lovely. It’s stuff like that which keeps me coming back every day.
WILL IT FLOAT: Tonight’s item: a can of cake frosting. And what are we playing for? A new motorcycle! Dave and Paul both agree it’ll float. The Late Show models drop the item into the Will It Float tank and it . . . . floats!
ACT 5:
Join us Monday for Rainn Wilson and Bell X1.
ACT 6:
Dave picks up the phone and says, “I’d like two tickets to ‘Into the Night with Rick Dees.’”
Oprah recently opened up the first Oprah Store in Chicago, devoted entirely to Oprah-related merchandise. But if you’re not in the Chicago area, you have other options. We take a look at what Dave is talking about. Announce: “New York City. Home of the world’s finest restaurant, theaters, and sightseeing attractions. There’s just one thing it’s been missing, until now: the Dave Store. (shot of a family of 4 entering the Dave Store at the corner of 53rd and Broadway. The following shots reflect the announce.) Here at the Dave Store, you’ll find a wonderland of merchandise inspired by America’s 7th favorite late-night talk show host, from hats and shirts, to meats and firearms. Plus, at our makeover booth, we can even make you look like Dave. (kids look like Dave; husband and wife look like Dave.)
The commercial continues and features Dave’s erotic section. We conclude with the husband, looking like Dave, passionately kissing his wife, who also looks like Dave.
I think I’ll pass.
ACT 7 BRIAN REGAN: Always one of my favorite comedians to visit the show. Tonight, Brian took on the issue of ‘reading.” I’m not sure if he’s for it. He’ll be performing at the Peabody Theater in Daytona Beach, Florida on March 27th.
And that was our show for Friday March 14, 2008.
OK, it’s official and I’m ready to make the announcement. It’s taken me 50 years to come to this decision but here it is:
The greatest song ever . . . . “Sweet Soul Music” by Arthur Conley. Put it on and dare you to remain seated. It can’t happen. Whenever I hear it I’m pretty much guaranteed to twist an ankle.
My 12-year-old daughter Danielle is doing a Science project about the phases of the moon. She’s drawn up the different stages of the moon, from New, to Waxing and Waning Crescent, to I think the Gibbous moons and the Full moon. Then she pasted the moons onto a white cue card that I stole from Tony, labeled each moon, and included a paragraph describing the different phases. It looks very good but she thinks it needs more. It seems the kids like to add some pizzazz to their presentations, which may have started with her sister Dominique for an English report earlier this year. I suggested that Danielle get a box of Oreo cookies. Pass out the cookies. Have the kids carefully twist the Oreos apart. Hopefully one half of the Oreo will present as a New Moon and the other half would show as a Full Moon. Danielle can then instruct the kids to nibble away at the white icing to form the different phases of the moon. Danielle thought the idea was genius. I hope to get an ‘A’ on the project. I mean, I hope Danielle gets an ‘A’.
Why do the Irish drink beer on St. Patrick’s Day? To wash down the dry lump of soda bread lodged in their throat.
Hey, it’s St. Patrick’s Day on Monday, time to unveil my recipe for the best Irish Soda Bread in the land. For years I attempted to bake an edible Irish Soda Bread and year after year I would fail. It became a running joke. But then I came across this recipe and suddenly my bread has become fantastic. It’s no longer a joke. It barely needs butter. Okay, maybe that’s going too far.
IRISH SODA BREAD
4 cups sifted all-purpose flour
˝ cup sugar
1 tsp salt
4 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
2 1/3 cup buttermilk
˝ cup shortening or margarine
1 1/3 cup seedless raisins
1 or 2 Tbsp caraway seeds
- Measure and sift together in a bowl the first 5 ingredients. Cut shortening into flour with pastry blender, 2 knives, or fingers until mixture has consistency of coarse corn meal. Add raisins, caraway seeds, and buttermilk. Add more buttermilk if needed.
- Turn dough onto a well-floured board. Using lightly-floured fingers, knead dough lightly, then shape into a 9-inch circle. Place in a well-greased, floured, round iron skillet. With a sharp knife, lightly floured, make a lengthwise and crosswise cut about 1/8 inch through the dough. Bake at 375 for 1 hour. Cool on rack.
When written, is it “a opossum” or “an opossum”? From Tom Bruce of Brooklyn (nee Lake Placid) New York.
“Great question. I admit I did not know the answer to ‘a opossum’ or ‘an opossum’ so I looked it up on Internet (thank you Al Gore), specifically the Purdue University website named ‘The Owl at Purdue.’ http://www.owl.english.purdue.edu. There I learned that the use of a/an is determined by the sound of the following word. So, even if that word begins with a vowel, if it sounds like a consonant you use ‘a.’ Thanks for stimulating my mind.”
And that’s that.
CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER
From Rockville Centre, New York, it’s Roy Currlin.
This concludes another episode of CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER
Michael Z. McIntee
Mikemack@aol.com
Jaime Pressly; and Brian Regan. PLUS: Drugged Tapwater; Action News; “Gettin’ Down with Larry King; McCain’s Running Mate; Great Moments in Presidential Speeches; a Top Ten list; Will It Float; and Late Show Fun Facts.
“. . . . and now, your source for clean-burning wood pellets . . . . . David Letterman!”
ACT 1:
As I typed this up on Friday morning, I got a phone call that my daughter wasn’t feeling well. I left and planned on finishing this at home. When I got home, I realized I didn’t bring all that I wanted. I’ll do my best.
Studies of municipal tapwater found that many cities’ water contains traces of several common drugs such as pain relievers and antibiotics. Dave was surprised to see this message. Announce:“Much of America’s tapwater has been found to contain drugs such as ibuprofen, naproxen, carbamazepine, monensin, and sulfamethoxazole.”
(shot of Amy Winehouse) “Thanks, dude!
Amy Winehouse. Leadership America can trust.”
Dave turns to the camera on his left. DAVE: “Coming up next on ‘Action News,’ hear the amazing story of an area blind man and his seeing-eye dog who both shot holes-in-one during the same round of golf! That’s coming up on News Fooooooooorrrrrrrre!”
It’s time now for something we call, “Gettin’ Down with Larry King.”
We see the recent show of Larry King with Janet Jackson. Janet has the unenviable task of trying to teach Larry King to dance.
Now that John McCain has sewn up the Republican nomination, he’s thinking about a running mate. Dave doesn’t know if voters will be pleased by his deliberation. Announce: “John McCain has secured the Republican Presidential nomination and is now considering a running mate. No decision has been made yet, but voters can rest assured that his pick will encompass the wisdom of his former colleague, William Jennings Bryant; the experience of his mentor Woodrow Wilson; and the brilliance of his late friend, Thomas Edison.
John McCain: He’s very old.”
GREAT MOMENTS IN PRESIDENTIAL SPEECHES
Bush – “Yesterday I went to their Caterpillar plant in Illinois where they make . . . . big bulldozers.”
ACT 2: LATE SHOW FUN FACTS – It’s great fun . . . and it’s a fact!
ACT 3: SIGNS YOUR COLLEGE BASKETBALL TEAM IS NOT GOING TO MAKE THE NCAA TOURNAMENT 6. They spend timeouts discussing who will win “American Idol” 4. School’s mascot is a giant asthma inhaler.
JAIME PRESSLY: From NBC’s My Name is Earl and a voice in the new film, Dr. Seuss’s Horton Hears a Who.
Jaime, pronounced Jamie, was born in North Carolina and came from a big family. When she was 13 she secretly sent her photo off to those backpage model searches in teen magazines. When the calls started coming in, her mom tried to get rid of them. Jaime had to tell her not to hang up. Jaime soon found herself on the cover of Teen magazine. (And it’s just that easy!) She and her mom moved to California to pursue her modeling career and she then moved on to Japan. It was quite a bit for a young teen but Jaime has always been very confident and adventurous.
Pressly . . . any relation to Elvis Presley? They spell their name differently but that’s not the end of the story. She was often teased when younger for having the “same” name as The King. Her grandfather would tell the story of a family feud many years ago and half the family changed the spelling of their last name and moved to Tennessee. It sounds like a tall tale but Jaime’s uncle got a photo of her grandfather and a photo of Elvis’s father and put them side-by-side. She swears they were the spitting image; same smile, same teeth, same face; so who knows?
Jaime won an Emmy Award for her work on “My Name is Earl” and the highly acclaimed animated “Horton Hears a Who” opened today. She’s also just completed a book, “It’s Not Necessarily Not the Truth.”
ACT 4:
During the commercial break, Felicia Collins and the CBS Orchestra performed a stirring “If You Don’t Know Me By Now.” Absolutely lovely. It’s stuff like that which keeps me coming back every day.
WILL IT FLOAT: Tonight’s item: a can of cake frosting. And what are we playing for? A new motorcycle! Dave and Paul both agree it’ll float. The Late Show models drop the item into the Will It Float tank and it . . . . floats!
ACT 5:
Join us Monday for Rainn Wilson and Bell X1.
ACT 6:
Dave picks up the phone and says, “I’d like two tickets to ‘Into the Night with Rick Dees.’”
Oprah recently opened up the first Oprah Store in Chicago, devoted entirely to Oprah-related merchandise. But if you’re not in the Chicago area, you have other options. We take a look at what Dave is talking about. Announce: “New York City. Home of the world’s finest restaurant, theaters, and sightseeing attractions. There’s just one thing it’s been missing, until now: the Dave Store. (shot of a family of 4 entering the Dave Store at the corner of 53rd and Broadway. The following shots reflect the announce.) Here at the Dave Store, you’ll find a wonderland of merchandise inspired by America’s 7th favorite late-night talk show host, from hats and shirts, to meats and firearms. Plus, at our makeover booth, we can even make you look like Dave. (kids look like Dave; husband and wife look like Dave.)
The commercial continues and features Dave’s erotic section. We conclude with the husband, looking like Dave, passionately kissing his wife, who also looks like Dave.
I think I’ll pass.
ACT 7 BRIAN REGAN: Always one of my favorite comedians to visit the show. Tonight, Brian took on the issue of ‘reading.” I’m not sure if he’s for it. He’ll be performing at the Peabody Theater in Daytona Beach, Florida on March 27th.
And that was our show for Friday March 14, 2008.
OK, it’s official and I’m ready to make the announcement. It’s taken me 50 years to come to this decision but here it is:
The greatest song ever . . . . “Sweet Soul Music” by Arthur Conley. Put it on and dare you to remain seated. It can’t happen. Whenever I hear it I’m pretty much guaranteed to twist an ankle.
My 12-year-old daughter Danielle is doing a Science project about the phases of the moon. She’s drawn up the different stages of the moon, from New, to Waxing and Waning Crescent, to I think the Gibbous moons and the Full moon. Then she pasted the moons onto a white cue card that I stole from Tony, labeled each moon, and included a paragraph describing the different phases. It looks very good but she thinks it needs more. It seems the kids like to add some pizzazz to their presentations, which may have started with her sister Dominique for an English report earlier this year. I suggested that Danielle get a box of Oreo cookies. Pass out the cookies. Have the kids carefully twist the Oreos apart. Hopefully one half of the Oreo will present as a New Moon and the other half would show as a Full Moon. Danielle can then instruct the kids to nibble away at the white icing to form the different phases of the moon. Danielle thought the idea was genius. I hope to get an ‘A’ on the project. I mean, I hope Danielle gets an ‘A’.
Why do the Irish drink beer on St. Patrick’s Day? To wash down the dry lump of soda bread lodged in their throat.
Hey, it’s St. Patrick’s Day on Monday, time to unveil my recipe for the best Irish Soda Bread in the land. For years I attempted to bake an edible Irish Soda Bread and year after year I would fail. It became a running joke. But then I came across this recipe and suddenly my bread has become fantastic. It’s no longer a joke. It barely needs butter. Okay, maybe that’s going too far.
IRISH SODA BREAD
4 cups sifted all-purpose flour
˝ cup sugar
1 tsp salt
4 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
2 1/3 cup buttermilk
˝ cup shortening or margarine
1 1/3 cup seedless raisins
1 or 2 Tbsp caraway seeds
- Measure and sift together in a bowl the first 5 ingredients. Cut shortening into flour with pastry blender, 2 knives, or fingers until mixture has consistency of coarse corn meal. Add raisins, caraway seeds, and buttermilk. Add more buttermilk if needed.
- Turn dough onto a well-floured board. Using lightly-floured fingers, knead dough lightly, then shape into a 9-inch circle. Place in a well-greased, floured, round iron skillet. With a sharp knife, lightly floured, make a lengthwise and crosswise cut about 1/8 inch through the dough. Bake at 375 for 1 hour. Cool on rack.
When written, is it “a opossum” or “an opossum”? From Tom Bruce of Brooklyn (nee Lake Placid) New York.
“Great question. I admit I did not know the answer to ‘a opossum’ or ‘an opossum’ so I looked it up on Internet (thank you Al Gore), specifically the Purdue University website named ‘The Owl at Purdue.’ http://www.owl.english.purdue.edu. There I learned that the use of a/an is determined by the sound of the following word. So, even if that word begins with a vowel, if it sounds like a consonant you use ‘a.’ Thanks for stimulating my mind.”
And that’s that.
CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER
From Rockville Centre, New York, it’s Roy Currlin.
This concludes another episode of CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER
Michael Z. McIntee
Mikemack@aol.com
ACT 1 • Show Open • Dave's Monologue Watch now • Drugs in NYC Tap Water • Dave's Action News Update • Maybe It's Time for Larry King to Hang It Up • McCain Considers Running Mate • Great Moments in Presidential Speeches
ACT 2 • Late Show Fun Facts
ACT 3 • Top Ten Signs Your College Basketball Team Is Not Going To Make the NCAA Tournament Read now
