DAVETV If you could look at only one thing on the Internet, DaveTV would be the obvious choice. What other so-called "website" lets you watch LATE SHOW Highlights, Comedy Clips, Slideshows, Stupid Trick clips and The Tony Mendez Show?
TOP TEN LIST You know it, you love it, you can't live without it: the revolutionary comedy bit that won Dave the Nobel Peace Prize. Check out the latest Top Ten List here.
TOP TEN ARCHIVES Old Top Ten Lists never die, they just get archived. The Top Ten Archives is searchable by date and keyword. Also, please note that the word "archives" contains the word "chives."
TOP TEN CONTEST So you think you're as funny as Dave's writers? Or maybe you just enjoy wasting time at work? See if you've got the chops to win a great prize in our weekly Top Ten Contest.
TOP TEN SEARCH Search Results.
TOP TEN SEARCH Search Results.
WAHOO GAZETTE LATE SHOW staffer Mike McIntee gives you a daily show summary and the behind-the-scenes lowdown with his daily Wahoo Gazette. So much juicy inside information that you'll say "Wahoo!"
THE WAHOO GAZETTE ARCHIVE Mike McIntee's popular Wahoo Gazette is archived here in the aptly- named Wahoo Gazette Archive. You can search by date, keyword, or show number, or even Dave's tie pattern (coming June 2012).
THE WAHOO GAZETTE ARCHIVE Mike McIntee's popular Wahoo Gazette is archived here in the aptly- named Wahoo Gazette Archive. You can search by date, keyword, or show number, or even Dave's tie pattern (coming June 2012).
Jada Pinkett Smith; Michael Cera; and The Sounds. PLUS:More Digital Changes; More Improvements in New York City; the Mayor Explains Broadway; a Top Ten List; Late Show Fun Facts; and Alan Kalter's Swimming Pool Chemical Review
" . . . and now, inventor of the lawn dart . . . . . David Letterman!"
ACT 1:
MONOLOGUE
- "Got a cute Father's Day gift from my son last year; a monogrammed Medic Alert bracelet."
If you're seeing Dave, you got through the digital TV transition okay. But the government has more changes planned. We take a look. Announce: "This final transition to digital television has taken place with minimal disruption. Further digital upgrades are coming. Be aware that as of August 1st, you will need a digital converter box for your telegraph key. The digital telegraph revolution means greater reliability, more interactivity, and futuristic-sounding beeps. To make sure you can still send word of railway accidents and stagecoach robberies, telegraph the Federal Telegraph Bureau for your converter box coupon today!
The Federal Telegraph Bureau: Dot dot dash dot dash dot dot"
Here in New York City, Broadway has been closed to traffic and turned into a pedestrian plaza. And that's not the only exciting changes in the works. We take a look at what other changes are planned. Announce: "Mayor Bloomberg's plant to close Broadway to traffic has been a rousing success, replacing noisy, congested traffic with lawn furniture and parking spaces. So keep an eye out for more improvements in the near future, as we convert the city's bridges into dog runs, the subway tracks into public swimming pools, and the Lincoln Tunnel into the world's largest Outback Steakhouse.
New York City: Going down the toilet in style."
ACT 2:
Back from commercial, we find Dave in the audience giving away money and free dinner certificates to a guy from the Niagara Falls' City Police Department. The guy gives Dave a nifty PD hat.
Mayor Bloomberger has decided close Broadway to all traffic. To explain his decision, we have the Mayor standing by on the phone. Dave picks up the phone. DAVE: "Good evening, Mayor Bloomberg. Thank you for speaking with us tonight."
MAYOR: "My pleasure, Greaseman. And here's a shout-out to all you listeners in the Windy City." DAVE: "That's Chicago, Mr. Mayor. We're here in New . . .
MAYOR: "I'm glad you asked, Greaseman. The closing of Broadway has been an overwhelming success, finally solving the city's crisis of where to store our surplus of chairs. And have you tried our nude yoga park at 49th and Broadway?" DAVE: "I wasn't aware there was a . . . ." CLICK. DIAL TONE.
LATE SHOW FUN FACTS
Accompanying letter from Gary Sherman of the FBMI:
"Good news! During the summer months, the free tour of the FBMI's Washington Headquarters also includes a complimentary tick check by an FVBMI nurse! Good health has never been more miscellaneous!"
Sincerely, Gary Sherman.
ACT 3:
TOP TEN: Things You Don't Want To Hear From Your Kids on Father's Day
10. "And you are?"
7. "Hey, dad, on your special day how
Jada Pinkett Smith; Michael Cera; and The Sounds. PLUS:More Digital Changes; More Improvements in New York City; the Mayor Explains Broadway; a Top Ten List; Late Show Fun Facts; and Alan Kalter's Swimming Pool Chemical Review
" . . . and now, inventor of the lawn dart . . . . . David Letterman!"
ACT 1:
MONOLOGUE
- "Got a cute Father's Day gift from my son last year; a monogrammed Medic Alert bracelet."
If you're seeing Dave, you got through the digital TV transition okay. But the government has more changes planned. We take a look. Announce: "This final transition to digital television has taken place with minimal disruption. Further digital upgrades are coming. Be aware that as of August 1st, you will need a digital converter box for your telegraph key. The digital telegraph revolution means greater reliability, more interactivity, and futuristic-sounding beeps. To make sure you can still send word of railway accidents and stagecoach robberies, telegraph the Federal Telegraph Bureau for your converter box coupon today!
The Federal Telegraph Bureau: Dot dot dash dot dash dot dot"
Here in New York City, Broadway has been closed to traffic and turned into a pedestrian plaza. And that's not the only exciting changes in the works. We take a look at what other changes are planned. Announce: "Mayor Bloomberg's plant to close Broadway to traffic has been a rousing success, replacing noisy, congested traffic with lawn furniture and parking spaces. So keep an eye out for more improvements in the near future, as we convert the city's bridges into dog runs, the subway tracks into public swimming pools, and the Lincoln Tunnel into the world's largest Outback Steakhouse.
New York City: Going down the toilet in style."
ACT 2:
Back from commercial, we find Dave in the audience giving away money and free dinner certificates to a guy from the Niagara Falls' City Police Department. The guy gives Dave a nifty PD hat.
Mayor Bloomberger has decided close Broadway to all traffic. To explain his decision, we have the Mayor standing by on the phone. Dave picks up the phone. DAVE: "Good evening, Mayor Bloomberg. Thank you for speaking with us tonight."
MAYOR: "My pleasure, Greaseman. And here's a shout-out to all you listeners in the Windy City." DAVE: "That's Chicago, Mr. Mayor. We're here in New . . .
MAYOR: "I'm glad you asked, Greaseman. The closing of Broadway has been an overwhelming success, finally solving the city's crisis of where to store our surplus of chairs. And have you tried our nude yoga park at 49th and Broadway?" DAVE: "I wasn't aware there was a . . . ." CLICK. DIAL TONE.
LATE SHOW FUN FACTS
Accompanying letter from Gary Sherman of the FBMI:
"Good news! During the summer months, the free tour of the FBMI's Washington Headquarters also includes a complimentary tick check by an FVBMI nurse! Good health has never been more miscellaneous!"
Sincerely, Gary Sherman.
ACT 3:
TOP TEN: Things You Don't Want To Hear From Your Kids on Father's Day
10. "And you are?"
7. "Hey, dad, on your special day how
©MMVII, CBS Broadcasting Inc. All Rights Reserved.