CBS

Season 14: Episode 4 - It Was Like A Caravan of Idiots (Siberia)

It Was Like A Caravan of Idiots (Siberia): Mother and son Margie & Luke used a new twist in the race, the Blind U-turn, to help allies Jamie and Cara by engineering the elimination of dating couple Amanda & Kris. Meanwhile, flight attendants Christie & Jodi overcome two near eliminations and soared into first place.

SORRY, WRONG NUMBER Departing the Pit Stop in first place at 10:49pm, father and son Mel & Mike ripped open their clue to discover they had to fly through Moscow to the city of Krasnoyarsk, deep in the heart of Siberia. When they landed, they had to travel by taxi to the structure printed on the back of the ten-ruble note: the Soviet-era Krasnoyarsk hydro-electric dam.

On the way to the Bucharest International Airport, stuntmen and brothers Mark & Michael asked their taxi driver to dial-up Lufthansa for them on his cell phone. Unbeknownst to them, the driver actually dialed the cell phone of the taxi driver for former NFL cheerleaders Jaime & Cara. The driver handed Cara the phone and when she realized who was on the other end, she decided to have a little fun at the brothers’ expense. Cara proceeded to imitate a Lufthansa agent while a clueless Mark asked for information. Mark was surprised to have an American Lufthansa agent, but didn’t suspect any foul play. Jaime & Cara held back their laughter through the call until they finally hung up, leaving a disappointed Mark thinking he had lost his phone connection to Lufthansa.

TAKING FLIGHT Knowing that information gathering would be paramount at this stage of the game, flight attendants Christie & Jodi stopped off at an Internet café on the way to the airport. After surfing the web, they found a lot of options for connecting through Moscow into Krasnoyarsk, but many of those choices had too short of a connection time in Moscow. The pair settled on an itinerary connecting through Istanbul that would land in Moscow three hours before their connecting flight would depart to Krasnoyarsk. The flight attendants would then land in Krasnoyarsk at 5:40am.

At the airport, different groups of teams chose different routes all knowing they would end up in Moscow on the same flight to Krasnoyarsk scheduled to land at 5:40am. Father and son Mel & Mike and dating couple Amanda & Kris opted to connect through Frankfurt en route to Moscow while sisters Kisha & Jen and brothers and stuntmen Mark & Michael chose to connect through Sofia, Bulgaria. Finally, former NFL cheerleaders Jaime & Cara, sibling lawyers Tammy & Victor, and mother and son Margie & Luke decided to connect through Munich.

TAKE THE LEAD Landing at 5:40am in Krasnoyarsk, Russia, brothers Mark & Michael, sisters Kisha & Jen, and flight attendants Christie & Jodi all got in taxis heading to the dam. It was then that they realized that the other five teams had missed the connecting flight in Moscow. Cara called missing the flight “a big bummer” while Kris added that transferring from one flight to another in Moscow is “really difficult.” While feeling bad for the other teams, flight attendants Christie & Jodi said, “We do feel good about the fact that they didn’t make the flight, because that should put us in the top three.”

Arriving together at the Krasnoyarsk Hydro-electric Dam still in the darkness of early morning, the three teams found the doors of the building locked until 8:30am. When the doors finally opened, the three teams ran to the cluebox and discovered they needed to travel to the Church of Saint Innokenty for their next clue.

WALL OF WOOD Brothers Mark & Michael led the pack to the church where they found a Detour that had them choose between Stack and Construct. In Stack, teams traveled to a nearby riverbank where they had to use a traditional method to stack a tall pile of firewood. In Construct, teams traveled on foot to a work shed where they would find materials to build a set of traditional wood shutters. After correctly assembling the shutters, they had to take them to a nearby house marked with a “Repairs Needed” sign and properly install them.

All three teams ran down to the riverbank where massive piles of wood waited for them. The teams knew that a good strategy in stacking would lead to success, while a bad one would lead to collapse. Jen likened the task to the game Jenga while Kisha added, “This is a lot of freakin’ wood!” The diminutive brothers fell behind early when Mark stacked an extra column of wood they didn’t need, but they continued onward as their pile began to rival their stature. Christie & Jodi and Kisha & Jen battled each other knowing that a shot at winning the leg was on the line. As the women approached the homestretch, Mark & Michael groaned when their massive pile came tumbling down. Instantly, the brothers opted to switch tasks and build shutters rather than try to reconstruct their wall of wood.

A NEW TWIST As the teams from the second flight reached the hydroelectric dam, the taller Kisha & Jen finished their woodpile, just ahead of the flight attendants, and opened their clue instructing them to travel to the Museum of the Novel “The Last Bow” where a new twist called a Blind U-turn awaited. A U-turn allows one team to slow down another team by forcing them to backtrack and complete the other side of the Detour. Previously, teams had to post their picture when using the U-turn and were publicly known as the perpetrators. In the twist, known as the Blind U-turn, the team using the U-turn remains anonymous.

Arriving at the Blind U-turn, sisters Kisha & Jen opted not to exercise their power because they had a sizable lead on the teams from the second flight. Hot on the sister’s heels, Christie & Jodi employed the same logic in not using the U-turn and both teams now raced to the local amusement park Bobrovy Log Park.

WOODPILE WOES While the stuntmen brothers Mark & Michael searched for the house in need of shutters, the five teams on the second flight arrived at the Church of Saint Innokenty and decided to stack wood. Dating couple Amanda & Kris took an early lead with father and son Mel & Mike close behind. As the dating couple’s wall neared completion, former NFL cheerleaders Jaime & Cara took note of Amanda’s lack of contribution to her team. Jaime sniped, “She’s doing nothing while he builds the thing. We don’t have any boys helping us.”

As the teams continued stacking, the strength of their massive walls and quality of construction became a key issue. After some wobbling, the wall of father and son Mel & Mike came crashing down followed by the walls of dating couple Amanda & Kris and former NFL cheerleaders Jaime & Cara. Jaime & Cara decided to keep stacking with Margie & Luke and Tammy & Victor. Mel & Mike and Amanda & Kris opted to switch tasks and build shutters, where they joined up with Mark & Michael who still could not find the house in need of repairs.

Now in third place after stacking their wood, mother and son Margie & Luke headed to the Blind U-turn just ahead of fourth place Tammy & Victor. Standing on the mat, Margie & Luke chose to U-turn Amanda & Kris because of the couple’s strength and speed. The mother and son added, “We wanted to give Jaime & Cara a little more time to finish their tasks. We didn’t want them to be eliminated.”

SPEED READING Sisters Kisha & Jen arrived at the Bobrovy Log Park still in first place and encountered a Roadblock. In it, one team member had to ride up to speeds of 55 miles per hour while completing a three-mile bobsled course in less than four minutes. During the ride they had to look for seven letters posted on the course along the way. Once finished, they had to unscramble the letters to correctly spell the name of a famous Russian playwright, Chekhov.

After muttering, “Lord, protect me”, Kisha jumped into the bobsled for her first run down the hill. Between her screams of excitement, Kisha took note of the letters that appeared along the course. However, when she reached the bottom in a qualifying time of 3:55, she only had six letters, so she needed to repeat the course to spot the seventh one.

While Kisha made her way back to the top to try again, flight attendant Christie took her turn on the bobsled while her partner Jodi waited anxiously below. Unlike Kisha, Christie spotted all seven letters, but as she neared the finish line, it was very uncertain whether she would complete the course in the required 4:00. With Jodi yelling for Christie to hurry, Christie zoomed past the finish line at exactly 4:00. However, once she began to unscramble the seven letters, Christie had no idea what name should be revealed.

WOMEN ON TOP After her second try on the bobsled garnered the elusive seventh letter, Kisha battled against Christie to unscramble the letters. Neither was particularly familiar with the name Chekhov, but eventually Kisha figured it out and solved the puzzle ahead of Christie. Opening the clue, the sisters learned they were heading to the Pit Stop at the Krasnoyarsk Theater of Musical Comedy. Christie followed on Kisha’s heels, but joked in the taxi, “I wanted to look brilliant and I didn’t.”

Sisters Kisha & Jen may have had the lead to the Pit Stop, but stepping out of their taxi, they couldn’t find the main entrance to the theater, allowing flight attendants Christie & Jodi to sneak ahead and win the leg. Phil rewarded the ecstatic team with a pair of motorcycles. On their victory, Christie noted, “We don’t want to get too confident, because we’ve been at the very top and we’ve dropped down to the very bottom, but we feel pretty good about being in first.”

LOST IN SIBERIA At the shutters workshop, a relieved Mark & Michael welcomed Mel & Mike and Amanda & Kris, hoping that by working together the three teams could locate the house in need to repairs. Once the father and son and dating couple constructed their shutters, the three teams trudged through the neighborhood in search of the house. On the motley crew, Mike quipped, “It was like a caravan of idiots holding their ladders with all their stuff in it.”

While those teams wandered, Luke struggled to unscramble the letters at the Roadblock. Margie commented, “With English as a second language for him, English literature was difficult enough, so I don’t think he knows what they’re asking.” The frustration mounted for Luke as he continually guessed wrong while Margie tried to encourage him to continue trying. Eventually, Luke grabbed a pen and went to work scrambling and re-scrambling the letters until he arrived at the answer, Chekhov, which he inserted into the answer board thus earning the clue to the Pit Stop. An exuberant Luke ended in fourth place just ahead of their friends Jaime & Cara.

After wandering very near the well-marked house needing repairs, Mel finally spotted the sign adorned with a yellow and red flag. Mel & Mike and Mark & Michael quickly attached the shutters jumping ahead of last place Amanda & Kris. After seeing the dating couple’s picture on the U-turn, Mike said, “I think that’ll just crush them.”

DON’T GIVE UP When the dating couple finally saw they had been U-turned, they simply commented, “Shady, shady.” Amanda added, “What conniving people. We’ve been nothing but nice to everyone.” The duo didn’t give up though, as they returned to the woodpile to continue stacking. When they finished the task, Amanda & Kris revealed that they (incorrectly) believed sisters Kisha & Jen U-turned them. To add insult to injury, they thought that Margie & Luke must have felt bad when they saw the dating couple’s picture on the U-turn.

After Mel & Mike nabbed sixth place, brothers Mark & Michael raced to the Pit Stop, while Kris sped down the bobsled track hoping to catch up. The brothers hit a snag when they realized they didn’t have enough money to pay their driver. The time the brothers spent finding a way to pay the driver allowed Amanda & Kris a slight chance at avoiding defeat. However, in the end, the taxi driver let Mark & Michael off the hook allowing the brothers to finish in seventh place.

Stepping onto the mat in last place, dating couple Amanda & Kris received the bad news from Phil that they had been eliminated from the race. On the experience, Amanda commented, “The best part of the race for me was traveling with Kris. We’ve done everything together but travel and to finally get to do that together has been awesome. We’ve bonded more than ever. I definitely see ourselves together for the rest of our lives.” Kris simply added, “I’m so deeply in love with her it’s ridiculous.”

1404 ROUTE MARKERS

Roadblock: A Roadblock is a task that only one person can perform. In this Roadblock, that team member had to ride up to speeds of 55 miles per hour while completing a three-mile bobsled course in less than four minutes. They also had to look for seven letters posted on the course along the way. Once finished, they had to unscramble the letters to correctly spell the name of a famous Russian playwright, Chekhov.

Performed Road Block: KISHA, CHRISTIE, VICTOR, LUKE, JAIME, MICHAEL, KRIS, MEL

Detour: A Detour is a choice between two tasks, each with its pros and cons. In this Detour, teams had to choose between Stack and Construct. In Stack, teams traveled to a nearby riverbank where they had to use a traditional method to stack a pile of firewood. In Construct, teams traveled on foot to a work shed where would find materials to build a set of traditional wood shutters. After correctly assembling the shutters, they had to take them to a nearby house marked with a “Repairs Needed” sign and properly install them.

Stack: KISHA/JEN, CARA/JAIME, MARGIE/LUKE, TAMMY/VICTOR, AMANDA/KRIS, CHRISTIE/JODI

Construct: MARK/MICHAEL, MEL/MIKE, AMANDA/KRIS

Blind U-turn: A U-turn allows one team to slow down another team by forcing them to backtrack and complete the other side of the Detour. Previously, teams had to post their picture when using the U-turn and were publicly known as the perpetrators. In the twist known as the Blind U-turn, teams remained anonymous. MARGIE/LUKE U-TURNED AMANDA/KRIS

Order of Finish:

1. Christie & Jodi 2. Kisha & Jen 3. Tammy & Victor 4. Margie & Luke 5. Jaime & Cara 6. Mel & Mike 7. Mark & Michael 8. Amanda & Kris