CBS

Season 16: Episode 2 - When the Cow Kicked Me in the Head (Chile)

When the Cow Kicked Me in the Head (Chile): COWBOYS RIDING HIGH
After a shaky first leg, cowboys Jet & Cord set the pace from the beginning to the end of the second leg as teams traveled to Puerto Varas, Chile. While most teams struggled with stick shift cars and unruly animals, in the end grandmother and granddaughter Jody & Shannon were eliminated.

TEAMS ALIGNDeparting the Pit Stop in first place at 3:21am, newly dating couple Jordan & Jeff opened their clue instructing them to travel by bus back to Santiago, and then board another bus for the 575-mile journey to Puerto Varas, Chile. Then, they had to drive themselves to a lake by the Hotel Petrohue, take a boat to Isla Margarita, and climb to a place called Mirador for their next clue.

Arriving at the Valparaiso Bus Station, Jordan & Jeff learned that it wouldn’t open until 5:00am giving the other teams ample opportunity to catch up. When the ticket window finally opened, all teams bought seats on a bus to Santiago where they would have to find the fastest way to Puerto Varas. While waiting to board the predawn bus to Santiago, dating couple Carol & Brandy targeted married couple Joe & Heidi as a team they wanted to work with because, in their eyes, Joe is “a really strong competitor.” When Carol & Brandy floated the idea of a partnership, Joe & Heidi agreed realizing that Brandy’s fluency in Spanish could be an asset.

BUS BUSINESSWhen the bus pulled into the Santiago station, all ten teams raced in search of tickets to Puerto Varas. Joe & Heidi asked an attendant who pointed the married couple to a window where they stood as the remaining teams formed a line behind them. Running in late, dating couple Carol & Brandy cut to the front of the line as Joe said, “We’re holding your spot.” Detectives Louie & Michael complained loudly to Joe, saying, “You can’t be holding spots. You can’t do that. There’s a line here.”

Joe’s controversial move paid off for himself, Heidi, and Carol & Brandy when they secured the last remaining tickets on the first available direct bus to Puerto Varas departing at 5:30pm and arriving at 7:00am the next morning. As a triumphant Joe walked away from the ticket window, Louie griped, “That little bastard squeaked his way right in there. He’s a sneaker.” Louie & Michael settled for the next best option, a bus departing at 7:45pm and arriving at 8:00am, with brothers Dan & Jordan, attorney moms Monique & Shawne, and father and daughter Steve & Allie. With the 7:45pm bus now full, grandmother and granddaughter Jody & Shannon had no choice but to take the 8:30pm direct bus arriving at 9:00am.

OTHER OPTIONSNot content to accept their fate on the last bus, newly dating couple Jordan & Jeff and dating models Brent & Caite decided to check other options in the bus terminal together as did cowboys Jet & Cord, independently of the dating couples. Jeff realized they could expand the possibilities by asking for buses that connect in another city before arriving in Puerto Varas. By doing this, he discovered a route through Temuco that departed within minutes, at 9:00am, that would arrive in Puerto Varas at 11:00pm, a full eight hours before the first direct bus. At a different window, Jet & Cord discovered the same information, so all three teams boarded the 9:00am bus as a wary Brent warned, “We are really rolling the dice because we are doing a connecting bus.”

STRANDEDAs the teams in Santiago began boarding their buses to Puerto Varas, the bus with Jet & Cord, Jordan & Jeff, and Brent & Caite arrived in Temuco. Brent told Jet & Cord that his connecting bus with Catie and Jordan & Jeff was departing at 6:30pm, while the cowboy’s bus left later at 7:00pm. In an attempt to buy tickets on the earlier bus, Jet & Cord discovered that the 6:30pm bus departed from a different station in central Temuco, ten minutes away. As they walked away from the counter, the cowboys realized that Brent & Caite and Jordan & Jeff were unaware of this vital information and joked, “Keeping it all under my hat.”

When the clock struck 6:29pm, the dating couples searched for their bus only to find that it wasn’t there. Now panicked, the two teams jumped into taxis in hopes of catching their bus in central Temuco. When they arrived at the terminal, an attendant told them that their bus had just left. With no other option, the teams got back in their taxis to try and catch the cowboys’ bus leaving at 7:00pm. This plan also failed when the couples returned to the terminal just as Jet & Cord’s bus pulled away. Now, stranded in Temuco, Jordan & Jeff and Brent & Caite found tickets on a bus departing at 1:00am that would arrive at 6:45am. A frustrated Brent said, “The cowboys are the most magical people ever.”

COWBOY UPArriving in Puerto Varas at 11:00pm, Jet & Cord jumped in a car and drove to Petrohue Hotel as rain began to fall. Pulling into the hotel, they discovered that the marked path to the lake didn’t open until 7:30am so they bedded down for the night in their car. The next morning, as the buses carrying Joe & Heidi, Carol & Brandy, Jordan & Jeff, and Brent & Caite pulled into Puerto Varas, the cowboys walked along the path, saying, “Extending our lead.”

Arriving at the shore of the lake in the rainy weather, Jet & Cord jumped into a boat and headed to Isla Margarita. When they made it to the island, they ran up to an open clearing at the point called Mirador and admired the view of the neighboring islands for a moment before opening their clue to find a Detour choice of Llama Adoration or Condor Consternation. In Llama Adoration, teams would have to enter a field of grazing llamas and choose a llama to dress, for a traditional festival, by putting a blanket and scarf on the sometimes stubborn and unruly animal. In Condor Consternation, teams had to dress as birds by putting on orange feet and a 16-foot pair of wings. Having turned themselves into a majestic condor, they then had to take flight in an attempt to soar to a target in the middle of the lake that contained their next clue.

STALLING OUTAs Jet & Cord headed off to adorn a llama, the second bus from Santiago arrived in Puerto Varas. While father and daughter Steve & Allie, attorney moms Monique & Shawne, detectives Louie & Michael all drove towards Hotel Petrohue with no problems, brothers Dan & Jordan got off to a rocky start. Neither brother proved skillful at driving a stick shift, but Dan ultimately assumed responsibilities when Jordan couldn’t even get the car moving, having forgotten to disengage the emergency brake. Their morning worsened when Jordan directed Dan down a dead-end road in a residential neighborhood at the lake’s shoreline. A frustrated Dan told his brother, “You’re killing me, kid. You’re an idiot.” Jordan snapped back, “You’re such a little punk. Just shut up and drive.” Ahead of only Jody & Shannon, who just arrived in Puerto Varas, the brothers finally got directions from a local to Petrohue Hotel.

ANIMAL ANTICSWith Joe & Heidi and Carol & Brandy on their heels, Jet & Cord arrived at the llama pen and quickly found a cooperative llama that wanted to be their friend. With a healthy pile of feed in their hands to keep the llama happy, the cowboys draped the blanket across its back and tied the scarf around its neck later calling themselves “llama whisperers.” Opening their next clue, the cowboys learned they had to drive to the Onces Bellavista Farm. 

As their boat pulled ashore, Brent & Caite couldn’t help but notice the massive scaffolding towering over the water and giant condor wings that waited for them. As the pair donned wetsuits and the bird feet, Brent said, “I never thought I’d dress like a bird and try to act like I was flying.” Walking up the ramp to the top of the scaffolding, the dating models put on the wings and, on the count of three, ran to the edge and jumped off. Unfortunately, their flight over the water was short lived as they plummeted into the cold lake and then swam to the buoy to retrieve their clue in fourth place.

RECIPE FOR VICTORYArriving at Onces Bellavista Farm in first place, cowboys Jet & Cord opened their clue to find a Roadblock. In it, one team member had to help continue the tradition of baking kuchen, brought to Chile by German immigrants, by racing around the farm to collect the five fresh ingredients essential to this delicious cake: flour, a plate of butter, a baker’s dozen of eggs, a bowl of sugar, and milk straight from the cow.

Cord set off to the barn first and quickly milked a cow collecting enough milk to fill a cup. As he walked away, Cord noted, “That’s not the first cow I’ve ever milked.” Running to the chicken coop, Cord made use of his hat’s rain protector by repurposing the plastic to collect the thirteen eggs. Then, running to the outdoor pantry, he gathered the plate of butter, bowl of sugar, and large bag of flour.  He then took them all to the bakers in the kitchen to receive his next clue instructing him and Jet to travel to the Pit Stop at Gruta de la Virgen, a park named for the Virgin Mary, back in Puerto Varas.

Arriving at Gruta de la Virgen in Puerto Varas, cowboys Jet & Cord stepped on the mat in first place and won a pair of sailboats. On their success, they said, “It just worked out right. We just happened to get on the right bus. Don’t let the cowboy hat fool you.”

ANIMAL ANGSTPlenty of other racers had different reactions to their experience on the farm. Working together, Heidi and Carol, neither of whom had milked a cow before, recoiled at the smells and sounds coming from the cows. Heidi momentarily fled in horror when a neighboring cow relieved itself right next to her. Brent told his cow, “You smell like ass.” Brother Jordan scolded his cow for her natural bodily function, saying, “Bessie, had you done that when I was milking you, we would not be friends.”

After having problems finding a tame llama to dress, detectives Louie & Michael fell into eighth place, ahead of only Brothers Dan & Jordan and grandmother and granddaughter Jody & Shannon. However, their narrow lead over those teams disappeared when the detectives drove right past the Onces Bellavista farm and back into Puerto Varas. Only when the pair happened upon Jordan & Jeff, on their way to a sixth place finish, did they realize their mistake. Now in last place, Louie & Michael raced back to the farm where Jordan completed the Roadblock in eighth place, and Jody began collecting her ingredients comfortably ahead of the detectives in ninth place.

ELIMINATION RACEWhen the detectives finally arrived at Onces Bellavista farm, Michael decided to collect the kuchen ingredients for his team hoping to catch up to Jody who was just beginning to milk her cow. As she neared the marked line on her cup, Jody had a major setback and a very scary moment when the cow kicked her in the head. While Jody wasn’t hurt, she spilled all of her milk and had to start over, giving Michael a chance to catch up. Michael capitalized on this opportunity and finished his milking ahead of Jody along with gathering the rest of his ingredients. As the detectives sped away from the farm in ninth place, Michael joked, “Let’s drive it like we stole it.”

Arriving at the Pit Stop in last place, Jody & Shannon received the bad news from Phil that they had been eliminated from the race. Shannon told Phil, “I’m so proud of my grandma for everything she’s done…getting kicked in the head by a cow.” Jody later added, “I’ve proven to myself that I can do physical things and I’m going to keep on doing them.”

1602 ROUTE MARKERS
Detour: A Detour is a choice between two tasks, each with its pros and cons.  In this Detour, teams had to choose between Llama Adoration and Condor Consternation. In Llama Adoration, teams entered a field of grazing llamas and choose a llama to dress for a traditional festival by putting a blanket and scarf on the sometimes stubborn and unruly animal. In Condor Consternation, teams had to dress as birds by putting on feet and a 16-foot pair of wings. Having turned themselves into a majestic condor, they then had to take flight in an attempt to soar to a target in the middle of the lake that contained their next clue.

Llama Adoration: JET/CORD, JOE/HEIDI, CAROL/BRANDY, MONIQUE/SHAWNE, LOUIE/MICHAEL, DAN/JORDAN, JODY/SHANNON

Condor Consternation: BRENT/CAITE, JORDAN/JEFF, STEVE/ALLIE

Roadblock: A Roadblock is a task that only one person can perform. In this Roadblock, one team member had to help continue the tradition of baking kuchen, brought to Chile by German immigrants, by racing around the farm to collect the five fresh ingredients essential to this delicious cake: flour, a plate of butter, a baker’s dozen of eggs, a bowl of sugar, and milk straight from the cow.

Performed Roadblock: CORD, BRENT, CAROL, HEIDI, MONIQUE, MICHAEL, JORDAN, STEVE, JODY

Order of Finish:

1.    Jet & Cord
2.    Joe & Heidi
3.    Carol & Brandy
4.    Brent & Caite
5.    Monique & Shawne
6.    Jordan & Jeff
7.    Steve & Allie
8.    Dan & Jordan
9.    Louie & Michael
10.    Jody & Shannon