Amy Poehler, Josh Hutcherson, Tegan and Sara, and a Top Ten List presented by NASCAR Sprint Cup Champion Bred Keselowski.
PLUS: The Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade; Dave's Turkey Recipe; The Late Show Curbs Your Appetite; Chris Christie Excited About Thanksgiving; Dave Mistaken for Another Celebrity; and a Phone Call from Karl Rove.
" . . . and now, gravy guru . . . . . . . David Letterman!"
Everyone is looking forward to this year's Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. Organizers have booked an interesting group of celebrities. We take a look.
ANNOUNCE: "This Thursday, enjoy a celebrated holiday institution . . . the 86th Annual Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade! Scheduled to appear are Whoopi Goldberg, Chef Sandra Lee, Mannheim Steamroller, and former NBA star Christian Laettner . . . . but tune in, anyway.
The 86th Annual Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. The disappointment starts at 9, only on NBC."
Thanksgiving is Thursday and Americans have a propensity to overeat on Thanksgiving. As a public service, we put together a little something to curb your appetite on the big day. We watch.
ART CARD: "Late Show Helps You Curb Your Thanksgiving Appetite"
We see a commercial for "Tag Away," a product that removes wart-ish, pimply skin tags from your body.
ART CARD: "Late Show Helps You Curb Your Thanksgiving Appetite"
It's almost Thanksgiving and no one's more excited than a certain politician we all know and love. Even while taking care of official business, the holiday is on his mind. We take a look.
We find New Jersey Governor Chris Christie speeching about sumptin. While speaking, he grabs a turkey, coats it with various seasonings, butters it down, and stuffs it. He does this all very smoothly. He's obviously done this before.
Dave, his wife, and his boy Harry went out to Steak and Shake this weekend. Dave likes to share his boyhood memories with his son. While waiting for their food, a guy comes up to Dave and asks,
"Are you Larry King?"
Dave sighs, then answers in the positive.
The guy then asks if he can take a picture with Dave because no one will believe he met Larry King at the Steak and Shake. They pose together, and now they each have a story to tell.
And then Dave adds, "And today is my wife's birthday!" Uhh, Dave . . . it's her birthday and . . . . 'Steak and Shake'?
TOP TEN: SIGNS YOURE NOT CUT OUT TO BE A RACE CAR DRIVER --- and her to present tonight's Top Ten list, the 2012 NASCAR Sprint Cup Series Champion, from Penske Racing, Brad Keselowsi.
Brad looks over to Dave and offers his condolences, and then his congratulations, to Larry King's wife.
SIGNS YOURE NOT CUT OUT TO BE A RACE CAR DRIVER
10. You're only in it for the intensely vibrating seat
9. You've always felt that passing other care is rude
8. Terms of your parole won't let you leave Delaware
7. All this week, you've been stockpiling Twinkies
6. Friends know you as "Mr. Motion Sickness"
5. You're existentially opposed to the starting line and finish line being the same line.
4. You know what 'existentially' means
3. You just don't like to be rushed
2. You can't even handle high-speed internet
1. More than ten minutes sitting? Crippling ass cramps.
AMY POEHLER - She and Tina Fey will be hosting the Golden Globe Awards. How did that come about? She says, "They asked, I said yes." Amy says the Golden Globes are one of the few times the movie star people hang with the TV stars, or as she puts it, those with a symmetrical face vs. those who are rat-faced.
There are so many award shows these days, the best way to tell the Golden Globes is it's the one with a lot of drinking.
Amy is the mom of two boys, age 2 and 4. The one boy said to her the other day, "Mom, I'm so sorry you don't have a penis." And then he followed that with, "Did you have one and break it?" How cute is that. Dave says his son is 9 years old and they never had that discussion. Amy tells Dave that's a good thing, son to dad.
Amy stars on the hit NBC series, "Parks and Recreation." Dave says of the program, "You're in your 5th season." Amy laughs because she thought Dave was going to say, "You're not in your 50s." Not yet, Amy, but boy does it come fast. Vice President Joe Biden makes an appearance on "Parks and Recreation" and Amy's character is infatuated with the V.P.. To her, he is the perfect guy. At the end of the day of shooting, Amy thought "What the heck" and planted a big kiss right on him. Like this? Dave quickly leans over and gives Amy a lip-to-lip kiss.
"Parks and Recreation" - Thursday nights at 9:30 on NBC.
Two weeks have passed since the presidential election and tonight we have a very special guest on the phone to give his perspective on what transpired. On the phone is Republican guru and head of the American Crossroads Super PAC, Karl Rove.
Dave picks up the phone to greet Karl Rove.
KARL: " . . . no no no no no no no no. You gotta be kidding me. Look, just beat it, buddy!"
DAVE: "Karl, are you there?"
KARL: "Hey, Wolf, sorry. It was just the paperboy."
DAVE: "Thank you for joining us. Tell us, upon reflection, why you think the election turned out the way it did."
KARL: "Look, Bud, this election isn't over! Hey, the polls area still open in two districts in Guam. (off phone) Ask Dick Morris to get me some coffee!"
DAVE: "Okay, as objectively as you can, tell us how you think the votes split demographically between the candidates."
KARL: "Well, Obama got women, African Americans, Latinos, gays, lesbians, African-American lesbians, immigrants, blue collar workers, union members, karate instructors, senior citizens, government employees, Scientologists, sports enthusiasts, model railroaders, private pilots, park rangers . . . "
DAVE: "And Romney . . . ?"
KARL: "Romney had a dump truck full of money and that hoo-hah Paul Ryan . . . boy, I tell ya, I'd like to slap him sleepy. (off the phone, very despondent) . . . Oh, God, I'll never get all that money back."
DAVE: "Can you describe, specifically, your financial arrangement with the Koch Brothers?"
KARL: "Oh, yes, I can get specific. They told me if I don't deliver, I'm a ghost. Poof! Gone! Get it, buddy?"
DAVE: "Are you frightened of them?"
KARL: "I'm scared hairless. That's why we gotta win this thing. Listen to me . . .two words: 'Take America Back!'"
DAVE: "But you do realize Mitt Romney conceded defeat."
KARL: "May may may maybe it's just a bad dream. Listen, you don't know where I could get 400 million, do you? (off phone) . . . . oh, God, all that money. Oh, my ass is grass." And then Karl goes all screwy with sound effects as if there is a big shoot out with the coppers. He hangs up. Poor, Karl. If only we could see him suffer like that instead of just having to hear it.
ANNOUNCE: "Get back here tomorrow for Dave and his guests Scarlett Johansson, Willie Nelson, and Gary Clark Jr. The Mayor's Fund to Advance New York City is providing relief to city residents affected by Hurricane Sandy. You can help. Visit NYC.gov/fund to make a donation. Thank you
He's just a kid of 20 years old and he's from Kentucky. Sure, anybody can be 20, and anybody can be from Kentucky, but to be 20 and from Kentucky and to be a big shot in show business . . . wow! You or your kids know Josh from his work in the big summer blockbuster "The Hunger Games." His "new" movie, "Red Dawn," comes out tomorrow but was filmed 4 years ago when he was 16. The film sat on the shelf for the past few year due to financial problems. I have friends like that. I think the movie is about a bunch of kids defeating Korea in a war.
TEGAN AND SARA
From their forthcoming album, "Heartthrob," the talented twins from Calgary performed "Closer."
And that was our show for Tuesday November 20, 2012.
What do you watching on TV on Thanksgiving growing up? In my house it was the parade, March of the Wooden Soldiers (Babes in Toyland), King Kong, and then football. But this Thanksgiving my TV set will be turned to VH1 Classic to watch the Rocky and Bullwinkle and Friends marathon. From 11 AM to 7 PM will be some of the best cartoons you'll ever want to see. You have to listen close, because the best jokes will fly right by you. Do yourself a favor and watch some Rocky and Bullwinkle and Friends.
Just days before Hurricane Sandy hit the east coast, New Jersey Transit parked $400 million worth of subway and rail equipment in a flood zone. The stuff ended up underwater . . . ruined. But it seems to be a big secret because no one is really talking about it. Who is responsible for this genius of thought? I mean, I hate myself when I make a typo on a blue card . . . . what must this person think who let $400 million of rail equipment flood out?
Wahoo Gazette Thanksgiving Tip: Shop Wednesday; Travel Friday.
CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER
It's her birthday on Sunday, it's Kathy Mulligan Hamre
This concludes another installment of CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER
Michael Z. McIntee
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