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Friday, August 30, 2013 Bill Murray helps Dave celebrate 20 years on CBS.
Show #3897
Bill Murray, and Lenny Kravitz and Gladys Knight.
PLUS: A Clip From the Very First Late Show; a Dave Regret; Good Batman, Bad Batman; Things Dave Doesn't Remember Saying; Video Congratulatory Messages; and a Top Ten List.

" . . . and now, captain of the Love Boat . . . . . . . David Letterman!"

ACT 1:
20 years of powerhouse comedy!
MONOLOGUE
- "Switzerland now offers a drive-thru for sex. They only way that would catch on here is if it came with fries."
- "Switzerland now has drive-thru prostitution. Talk about your Jiffy-Lube."

Tomorrow is the
20th Anniversary of the very first Late Show. Dave doesn't normally like looking back at the old shows, but since it's our anniversary, why not? We show a clip of the very first Late Show from August 30, 1993.
We cut to The Pat Sajak Show. We added the Late Show theme. The graphic reads: "Dave Letterman - August 30, 1993."
PAT: "Our first guest is the two-time Grammy winner, over 3 million albums he has sold, featuring songs like 'I Lost on Jeopardy' and 'Fat'. Please welcome, 'Weird Al' Yankovich."

Regrets over the years? Yeah, Dave has had a few. One that comes to mind is his on-air colonoscopy. We see the clip we use for every colonoscopy joke. It's the spelunkers.

Many people are upset that Ben Affleck has been named to play lead in the next Batman film. Over the years, there have been many to play the Cape Crusader, some doing a good job, some not. That brings us to this segment, "Good Batman, Bad Batman."
ANNOUNCE: "Good Batman" - we see Christian Bale doing his best Batman.
"Bad Batman" - we see Joe Theismann in a Batman mask: "My prostate was giving me fits!"
ANNOUNCE: "This has been 'Good Batman, Bad Batman.'"

20 years doing the Late Show and there are plenty of great things to remember, but there are also things of which Dave has no recollection. We take a look at this.
ART CARD: THINGS DAVE DOESN'T REMEMBER SAYING ON THE LATE SHOW
We see a clip from November 01, 2011: "I will clear this room so fast it will make your vagina spin."
Check out the Wahoo Archives to read what spurred that on.

ACT 2:
The first Late Show - August 30, 1993. Since that time, we have done 3,901 Late Show programs; 3,897 regular shows and 4 prime timers. Add that to Dave's Late Nights and he and Paul have done 5,711 late night episodes. Paul exclaims, "Hey, that's the Jewish year, isn't it?" I laughed and said aloud to a non-present Paul in the shack, "No, it isn't, Paul." I laughed and knew it wasn't because I thought the exact same thing earlier when I was typing up the blue card. I had already checked it out.
The current Jewish Year is 5773. Next week we'll celebrate 5774. We'll coincide on Late Show #3964, I'm guessing in early January.

This being Dave's 20th Anniversary of the Late Show, many celebrities sent in congratulatory video messages to Dave at the theater. We take a look.
KIM KARDASHIAN: "I just wanted to say congratulations on your /anniversary (my dub)/ show. I'm sorry I couldn't be there in person, but I'm just loving life too much at home right now."
PRESIDENT OBAMA: "Over the years, I've been greatly moved by the warmth and spirit, the strength and resolve of / David Letterman (my dub) /."
GEORGE CLOONEY AND BRAD PITT: "Hey, it's me, George Clooney (my dub), and I'm Brad Pitt . Congratulations, you son-of-a-bitch (Gary Mintz dub)."

TOP TEN TOP TEN LIST ENTRIES FROM THE PAST 20 YEARS - Over the past 20 years, we have prepared 39,000 Top Ten items. Dave questions the accuracy of that number. PROVE ME WRONG, ANNIVERSARY BOY!
I figured: 3,900 shows over the past 20 years --- 10 Top Ten entries a show. We don't always do a Top Ten, but we always have one prepared.
TOP TEN TOP TEN LIST ENTRIES FROM THE PAST 20 YEARS
10. Self-cleaning meatball.
9. Wet mustache contest.
8. "Swiss Family Buttafuoco"
7. A Regis tattoo right in the middle of your ass.
6. Irritable Owl Syndrome
5. "Hey, Hasselhoff, go easy on the crab puffs."
4. "Neuter, She Wrote"
3. ""How Chuck Got His Knob-Locked"
2. "Beef-a-Romney
1. Clintern

ACT 3
BILL MURRAY
Dave considers him the funniest man alive; the gold standard which all others who make their living in comedy are compared.
Bill enters in a beautiful white Rolls Royce. He is escorted by men in white. His Scott Thorsen opens the back door of the Rolls and Bill exits. Bill is adorned in his best Liberace flair; all in white with a long flowing cape. It's a tremendous entrance. We hope it doesn't take away from Dave on his special day.
Bill is thrilled to be here on this special night. He wanted to do something special for Dave and directs out attention outdoors to a huge draped billboard across the street. On the count of "one two three I love you," the drape falls. We see a huge photo of a contemplative Bill. His name is splashed in red across the bottom. And in small print under the photo, below his name, reads: "Wishes Dave a Happy 20th Anniversary."

Bill is always busy and spent this past year making films with Wes Anderson, George Clooney, and now in Brooklyn. We see a photo of Bill in a film with John Goodman, Matt Damon, Bob Balaban, and George Clooney. They are soldiers in fatigues walking through a disheveled city during World War II. The film is called, "The Monument Men," about soldiers whose mission it is to track down stolen art. My eyes widened with surprise because just the night before I watched 15 minutes of a discussion on the very subject on the TV. Bill is very proud of the picture, calling it "A meatloaf of a film. It has a little bit of everything." Dave enjoys the description and says he never heard it put that way, "a meatloaf of a film." Bill, the professional comedian, doesn't take credit for the phrase and credits from whom he first heard it, a name I missed. Kudos, Bill.
We then take a look at a clip of Bill with Chicago Cubs announcer Harry Caray during the very first night game played at Wrigley Field, August 8, 1988. Bill was able to score 15 tickets to the game for his family and friends. Early in the game, the rain came storming. He was able to tell Harry Caray was looking for him to fill time during the nationally televised rain delay. On a night Bill was expecting to be merely a spectator, he was called in to work.

Bill was Dave's very first guest here at the Late Show 20 years ago. Does Bill remember much from that night? Bill admits to remembering very little from today, let alone 20 years ago. He knew 20 years ago that the first show was important and did something few of us realized. Bill dug a hole and placed a time capsule under the guest chair. How he did this without our knowing, I don't know. I just want to say I wasn't working here at that time. Yes, I will say that I think I would have noticed, but there was a lot going on that night and it's understandable that it could have been missed. Bill works to retrieve the buried time capsule. He throws the guest chair aside and takes out a razor to cut a circle in the carpet. He throws the carpet away and takes a pick ax to the floor. He chops a hole in the home base in search of the time capsule. Bill begins to tire. He has a hard time finding the time capsule. He stops and thinks a minute. He then recalls, ". . . . . . it was the other chair." He pushes the second guest chair aside and repeats. After the pick ax, Bill then takes a jackhammer to the hole. Finally, pay dirt! After twenty years of hiding, the time capsule is discovered. SPOILER ALERT FOR THOSE WITH TIME WARNER CABLE WHO WILL VIEW THIS MUCH LATER
Inside the time capsule, Bill removes a New York Post from August 30, 1993, with a small headline along the top of the front page: "Jay Leno - Up Close and Personal." We see the hairpiece Dave wore that night. Yes, it was red.
A photo of Dave and Bill from Show #1.
And a Billboard magazine, offering a peek of what was popular at the time.
Do you recall what was the #1 song on August 30, 1993? Bill remembers, as does Paul. Paul and the band begin, and Bill jumps in. It's Whitney Houston's "I Will Always Love You." Beautiful. There was barely a wet eye in the house.

And that was your typical Bill Murray. Wonderful Bill Murray.

ACT 5:
ANNOUNCE: "We've got a good thing going tomorrow with Dave and his guests Denzel Washington, and James McCartney. Have fun with your Labor Day costumes, kids!"

ACT 6:
LENNY KRAVITZ AND GLADYS KNIGHT
From the soundtrack of "Lee Daniel's The Butler," a song written by Lenny Kravitz, Lenny and the great Gladys Knight performed "You and I Ain't Nothin' No More." This was Gladys Knight's very first time on any of Dave's shows, daytime included.

ACT 7:
As a goodnight, we see a montage of still shots over the years from the Late Show. I'll have a list sometime in the future. It numbers nearly 300.

And that was our show for Thursday August 29, 2013.

The Pat Sajak Show - I went to a Pat Sajak Show. I remember Larry Drake from L.A. Law was a guest. The only other thing I remember was at the end of the show when Pat Sajak said thank you and good night . . . and then was informed he had another minute. He stumbled and stammered his way through another minute.

Tonight's Top Ten - TOP TEN TOP TEN LIST ENTRIES FROM THE PAST 20 YEARS.
I was thrilled to hear Dave once again say "Buttafuoco."
From the December 4, 2012 Wahoo Gazette - the Top Ten topic was Least Likely Names For The Royal Baby. Having some time that day, I gave in 11 suggestions. One was "Buttafuoco." I desperately wanted to hear Dave say "Buttafuoco" one more time. It wasn't selected back then. But tonight . . . tada! It wasn't mine this time, but I finally got my wish.

Seeing Bill Murray digging up his time capsule reminded me of the time I did that. My neighbor Johnny and I collected baseball cards. Somehow back in 1969, we knew that old baseball cards would be worth a lot some day. We decided to bury our 1969 cards in his backyard. We picked out a tree, paced off two steps that way and then two steps this way, and then dug a hole. We put 600 baseball cards in a shoebox and then dropped the shoebox into the hole. We covered it with dirt, promising each other we would never forget where he put it. The next spring we decided it was time to dig them up. Thinking about it now, I don't think the cards increased much in value over 6 months. After digging 9 holes we just about gave up looking for the cards. And then on the 10th, we found what looked to be a tiny piece of a baseball card. There was nothing else. Disintegration disintegrated out dreams. We learned two things:
1. to always make a map of where you hide something,
2. a cardboard box doesn't provide much protection against rain, snow, and freezing temperatures.

FRIDAY AND MONDAY'S PREVIOUSLY VIEWED PROGRAMS
FRIDAY: From July 29th; #3886 - Denzel Washington, and James McCartney. Plus: Small Town News, and Alan Kalter's "Come On, Everybody!"
MONDAY: From August 22nd; #3893 - Serena Williams; Sean Donnelly; and MGMT.

And now it's time for "This Date in Cameo Mention of a Wahoo Reader History"
From August 29, 2001 - Liz and George Borden. Congratulations on the newborn!
This concludes another installment of "This Date in Cameo Mention of a Wahoo Reader History"

CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER
A SUNY Brockport Golden Eagle, it's Karen Owen
This concludes another installment of CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER

Michael Z. McIntee
mikemack@aol.com
Twitter: @WahooMike

Tonight's Guests

Sally Field
Timothy Simons
Needtobreathe

Wahoo Gazette Archive

Monday, April 21
Dave's grandpa gives new meaning to "Hammertime."
Wednesday, April 9
How does Lindsay Lohan like her scrambled eggs?
Tuesday, April 8
Dave guarantees his retirement with a signature.
Friday, April 4
LiV Warfield raises the roof of the Ed Sullivan Theater.
Thursday, April 3
Dave and Intern Todd enjoy racing fun at the Grand Prix.