Search By Date
M T W Th F
Saturday, October 18, 2014 Do Alan and Foo Fighters' Pat Smear have something going on ?
Show #4105
Jessica Chastain, Lenny Marcus, and Foo Fighters.
PLUS: A Nielsen apology; the Martha/Gwyneth feud; the Florida gubernatorial debate; an apology from the Texas hospital; a new dating app; and a Top Ten List with the Foo Fighters!

" . . . and now, the dulcet-toned town crier . . . . . . David Letterman!"

ACT 1:
- "Airports are now taking your temperature. The worst part is sitting in the waiting room in your underpants."
- "Engineers are developing an elevator that goes into space. There's not enough small talk in the world . . . "
- "Opening today, 'Fury,' about a World War II tank crew. It taps into everyone's fear of being in a confined space with Shia LaBeouf."
- "President Obama played his 200th round of golf. Obama's now driving the ball over 250 yards. Even his golf ball is distancing itself."
- "Jeb Bush and Mitt Romney may both seek the nomination. It's like choosing between vanilla and vanilla bean."

A glitch in Nielsen's ratings software caused some television program ratings to be misreported. Nielsen issued this apology.
ANNOUNCE: "Nielsen apologizes for the recent software glitch that caused television ratings to be misreported. The top five most watched programs last week were: 'Sunday Night Football,' 'The Big Bang Theory,' 'NCIS,' 'Scandal,' and 'The Voice,' not, as we reported, 'Damp Justice,' 'Lasagna General,' 'Sex Lawn,' 'Furniture Fight,' and 'Late Squat with Mike Piazza.'
We regret the error."

Martha Stewart and Gwyneth Paltrow are in a feud. The TMZ, I think got some of their feuding on video earlier today. We take a look.
We cut to a scene from that "Martha is a terrible person" TV movie. We see "Martha" driving up to a 'Gwyneth'. Martha snarls, "Hey, slut! I'm sending your parents a letter telling them you're a whore."
Dave loves that clip. We'll make up a set-up just to get to it. It doesn't really matter what it is.

Florida Governor Rick Scott refused to participate in his gubernatorial debate because his opponent brought a fan. We take a look at part of the debate.
ANNOUNCE: "Charlie Crist has asked to have a small fan placed underneath his podium.
Governor Rick Scott says this is a violation of debate rules and, therefore, will not participate in tonight's debate. And I am told that Governor Scott is also complaining about that the carpet is littered with fuzzies . . . . that his pants are too static-y . . . that he was promised free refreshment . . . and that his understanding what that tonight's moderators would be Wolf Blitzer, Salma Hayek, and Ted from the movie 'Ted.' Frank (on the panel), have you seen the movie 'Ted'?"
FRANK: "No, I haven't"

Texas Health Presbyterian Hospital in Dallas has apologized for not following proper protocols. Did you see the apology from the hospital? We take a look.
We see the exterior of the Texas Health Presbyterian Hospital. The actual hospital building speaks from an animated mouth, apologizing as Donald Sterling, begging forgiveness, promising to never do it again. It was a one-time thing.

ACT 2:
There's a new app that helps you meet strangers who would like to cuddle with you. It's hard to keep up with all the dating apps out there, so we take a look at this helpful roundup.
- "Cuddlr: Where you can find people who want to cuddle."
- "Grindr: Where you can find men interested in other men"
- "Spousr: Where you can find people interested in sleeping silently next to you with no hope of physical or emotional intimacy for the rest of your sad, sexless lives."
Happy matchmaking, everybody!"

TOP TEN: THINGS FOO FIGHTERS WOULD LIKE TO SAY AFTER SPENDING A WEEK AT THE LATE SHOW - and here with tonight's Top Ten List, Foo Fighters! The Fighters of the Foo enter.

10. Taylor Hawkins: "We agreed to be here because we thought Dave was dying."
9. Nate Mendel: "A big thank you to the dozens of people watching."
8. Chris Shiflett: "So far, no mention of us getting paid."
7. Pat Smear: "All in all, not a bad place to be quarantined."
6. Dave Grohl: "Next week, catch us on 'Judge Judy'"
5. Taylor: "I never got to plug my cookbook."
4. Nate: "Every staffer here asked me for weed."
3. Chris: "Not every Top Ten List is a winner."
2. Pat: (looking to Alan Kalter, longingly) "I'll miss you, Alan." (Alan responds: "I'll miss you, too, Pat.") - Their loving gaze to each other remains much longer than anyone finds comfortable.
1. Dave: "And we thought we were dysfunctional!"

Foo Fighter fans, unfortunately, were all busy watching the "Foo Fighter: Sonic Highways" HBO documentary during this Top Ten List.

ACT 3:
Jessica stars in the new film, "Interstellar." In the past 6 years, Jessica's been in an amazing 18 films that have collectively earned half a billion dollars and she's received two Academy Award nominations. In 6 years from nothing, to that! She says she hasn't been outside a studio in all that time. The work was non-stop, but she's certainly not complaining. She finally decided to take a break. Almost immediately she worried that she would never work again.
To keep busy, Jessica took a cooking class here in New York City at the Natural Gourmet Institute. It must be a pretty specialized class because Jessica is a Vegan, eating no animal products and feeding on mostly grains and vegetables. Being out of the studio for the first time in years, Jessica notices she gets a lot of "I think I know you" stares. She says she would prefer the "Hello, how are you" rather than the sneaking and pretending of those who have seen her movies, wanting to shoulder-up to her without the interaction. I think when Jessica gives it time she will be more than happy with the sneaking and pretending without the interaction.
Her new film, "Interstellar" is a highly-anticipated, super-secret epic. It also stars Matthew McConaughey, Anne Hathaway, and Michael Caine. It's about a team of explorers, all gorgeous, who travel beyond the galaxy on a mission to save the world. The film is so secretive that Jessica didn't even bring along a clip. But this is Dave she is talking to. If Dave wants a clip, he'll get a clip. Dave knows a guy who knows a guy. He got us a clip. We take a look. Hmmmm. Apparently the guy Dave knows only knows Shecky. I don't think that was a clip from "Interstellar."
"Interstellar" - it opens nationwide on November 7th. If the world ends on November 8th, you'll know their mission was unsuccessful.

ACT 5:
ANNOUNCE: "We'll see you Monday for Dave and Robert Downey Jr., Sarah Paulson, and Lizzo. Stay tuned for a sneak peek at the weekend plans of your distant relatives."

ACT 6:
You can see him regularly at the Comedy Cellar right here in New York City. A lot of things bother Lenny, a lot of the same things that bother me, such as Andrea vs. Ahn-drea, and Gluten-free dating. Ever have vegan cupcakes? Why bother? Cupcakes are so good, why take away what makes them so good? Vegan cupcakes are a thing now. I'm sure there are many things in your life that is a "vegan cupcake."

ACT 7:
Tonight, Foo Fighters performed their first single off their latest album, "Sonic Highways," in stores November 10th. Joining Foo Fighters tonight is Cheap Trick's Rick Nielsen. You like the hard rockin' head bangin' music? You'll like "Something From Nothing."

And that was our show for Friday October 17, 2014.

I was talking to stagehand Pat Farmer before Friday's show. He gushed how nice Dave Grohl and the entire band were the whole week. I like to find out what the stagehands think about this person and that person; that band and this band. I feel they get the best look at how the celebs behave without the camera on them. Pat says the Foo Fighters, all of them, and everyone with them were nice as could be. Great guys, friendly, fun.

And they were good at everything we asked. They nailed very comedy bit they were in. First time was always a keeper. They make everything seems so easy. Talent like that kinda makes me mad.
Of course, to make anything look easy you have to work like hell at it.

I had to drive something up to my daughter at Marist College on Monday. She needed her eyeglasses and contacts she had forgotten at home. I got there at 11:30 at night . . . Monday night. As I turned on to campus, I noticed there were lights on the soccer field. I saw about 100 students kicking soccer balls around. There were a few games going on . . . at 11:30 at night . . . on a Monday. Damn! I love college! That's exactly what it's supposed to be; doing stuff you will never do again. It was my mantra in college: "If not now, when?" Though truth be told, a lot of things I did in college that I thought I would never do again . . . . I'm still doing . . . . at 56.

Lot of people out sick this week. I suspect many are coming down with a case of the "job interview."

Congratulations to longtime Kansas City Royals fans Brian Hall and David Yoder. Enjoy the ride! I'm sure even San Francisco Giant fans know the rest of the country will be rooting for the Royals.

MONDAY: From 10/07/14; Show #4097 - Robert Downey Jr., Sarah Paulson, and Lizzo. Plus: Nils Lofgren sitting in with the band.
TUESDAY: From 9/22/14: Show #4086 - Mark Harmon, and Jack Hanna
WEDNESDAY: From 9/11/14; #4084 - Jason Bateman, Billy Eichner, and Ryan Adams.
THURSDAY: From 9/23/14; #4087 - Denzel Washington; and Lenny Kravitz
FRIDAY: From 9/26/14; #4089 - Jerry Seinfeld, and Cirque du Soleil's "Michael Jackson One." Plus: Alan Kalter's "Where Does It All Go?"

Check the Wahoo Archives and make your plans accordingly.

October 17, 2000: Gordon Wong. Thanks for telling me the piano/hand joke.

This concludes another installment of "This Date In CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER History

From Charleston, South Carolina, it's horn blower Ken Mullin
This concludes another installment of CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER

Michael Z. McIntee
Twitter: @WahooMike

Tonight's Guests

Jerry Seinfeld
Michael Jackson ONE

Wahoo Gazette Archive

Saturday, October 18
Do Alan and Foo Fighters' Pat Smear have something going on ?
Thursday, October 16
Dave takes the temperature of a home viewer.
Wednesday, October 15
Run, Bill Murray, run!
Tuesday, October 14
The Wilson sisters, Nancy & Ann, rock out with Foo Fighters.
Monday, October 13
Five nights of Foo Fighters kicks off with Zac Brown.