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Wednesday, October 3, 2012 Does this uniform make Tim Tebow look fat?
Tina Fey, Senator Rick Santorum, and LP.
PLUS: the new NFL uniforms; American Airlines explains; a debate promo from Telemundo; and a Top Ten list.

" . . . . and now, with his three-minute rebuttal . . . . . . David Letterman!"

ACT 1:
No time for a Wahoo today. I went to a "What You Need To Know For College" meeting Thursday morning, the time I usually finish up the Wednesday Wahoo. What I learned is my daughters better get some scholarships. There were about 100 parents at the meeting. And as what happens at every gathering, there is one person who thinks it is a private meeting, as if the entire proceeding is for him or her. One woman kept stopping the flow to ask a question. She finally had to be told that questions would be entertained at the end of the meeting. When that time came, she had a book-full of questions. Nine out of every ten questions were unnecessary and could be answered with a simple look in the Google. Plus, she was asking questions that didn't need to be known for another 8 months. And I made the mistake of being the good guy and moving to the middle of the row of seats and not hogging up the aisle. Since I was sitting in the middle, with a dozen people on each side of me, there was no easy escape. I was stuck. I couldn't leave without causing a stir. I sat and waited for an opening. I eventually made it out. As I hustled out the door, I heard her ask, "What does the 'P' stand for in PSAT?"

MONOLOGUE
-"During the debate, keep an eye on the body language. Clutching the podium is a sign of strength. A sign of weakness is clutching your blankee."

The new NFL football uniforms are making some of the players look fat. We take a look at Tim Tebow in regular clothes. And then we see him in the new uniform. Tebow turns into Chris Christie.
The worst thing about the new New York Jets uniforms is that it makes the players look like New York Jets.

American Airlines is having a lot of trouble with their seats. Seems like they forgot to bolt them down. Yipes. I hope they secured the propellers! American came out with this explanation.
ANNOUNCE: "American Airlines apologizes to those customers adversely affected by detached passenger seats. However, this is simply a result of our updated service charges. In addition to baggage and extra legroom costs, supplemental fees apply for seats that are securely attached to the plane. There's a small charge for seats secured with Velcro. A larger fee for actual bolts. American Airlines: Your Big Box Air Travel Shop."

Are you excited about the Presidential Debate? Telemundo is. We take a look at how they promoted tonight's debate.
ANNOUNCE: (in Spanish; translated here) "President Obama and former governor Mitch Romney square-off in the first of three debates. Sponsored by Tide Laundry Detergent. Two men enter, one man leaves. Also scheduled to appear, Jose Biden and Pablo Ryan, star of P90X. It's gonna be crazy!"
The above announce was accompanied by zany and wacky footage from the Telemundo network.

ACT 2:
TOP TEN: SIGNS YOU HAVE A BAD DEBATE MODERATOR

7. Moderates debate via speakerphone; greets candidates with "Hello, Angels."
1. Refers to candidates as "The Mormon" and "The Kenyan"

My submits:
-Starts the debate with, "Let's Get Ready To Rummmmmmmmbbbbble!"
-The moderator is an NFL replacement ref.
-When the three-minute rebuttal time expires, yells "Yahtzee!"
-Leaves for a half hour to watch "2 Broke Girls"

ACT 3:
TINA FEY
- it's the 7th and final season of "30 Rock." I've never watched a full episode of "30 Rock" but I'm excited because years from now it'll be my "Seinfeld," catching up on all the episodes in repeats and syndication.
"30 Rock" - Thursdays at 8:00 PM on NBC.

ACT 4:
SENATOR RICK SANTORUM

-There are no leaders in Congress, only followers
-The divisiveness in Washington is not reflected in the people across America -C-SPAN has created a stage for the Congress to perform. This has a lot to do with why nothing gets done. Everybody wants to be seen and heard and to look good for their constituents at home. (This would be true if anybody actually watched C-SPAN)
-Santorum's book: "American Patriots: Answering The Call to Freedom"

ACT 5:
ANNOUNCE: "Tomorrow! Here! You! And Craig Ferguson! From 'Pitch Perfect' Anna Kendrick, and The Raveonettes. Plus, check out The Wallflowers Live on Letterman! The Wallflowers' exclusive Ed Sullivan Theater concert webcast is live Thursday at 9 PM Eastern, 6 PM Pacific. Only at CBS.com/lateshow. So quit your belly achin'"

ACT 7:
LP:
From her CD, "Into The Wild," LP performed "Into The Wild."

And that was our show for Wednesday, October 3, 2012.

I liked LP. LP is short for Laura Pergolizzi. She reminded me a little of Nick from "Family Ties"
And after listening to her song, for some reason I wanted to go to my ATM.

Santorum's book: "American Patriots: Answering The Call to Freedom." I haven't read it; I haven't even leafed through it, but it seems like the pulled a bunch of "exciting" words out of a Conservative's hat and titled a book from that.
"American" - check
"Patriots" - check
"Answering The Call" - check
"Freedom" - check
OK, we have a book title, now let's write the book.

So, where were you 61 years ago? If you were at the Polo Grounds, you saw the greatest home run in major league baseball history. Bottom of the 9th, two outs and down by two, Bobby Thomson hit the Shot Heard 'Round The World as the New York Giants defeated the Brooklyn Dodgers in the 3rd game of the playoffs. The Giants win the pennant, the Giants win the pennant, the Giants win the pennant!"
The Giants were 13 games behind the Dodgers in August. The slowly but steadily crept closer and closer to the Dodgers. And then in the playoff, BAM! The month-and-a-half long comeback is called The Miracle of Coogan's Bluff." Why Coogan's Bluff? It's the name of the bluff separating Harlem from Washington Heights in Manhattan where the Polo Grounds, home of the New York baseball Giants, was located. Coogan was a real estate owner and the area was called "Coogan's Bluff" first heard in 1893.
I lived in Washington Heights for 5 years in the mid-90s. I drank at a place called "Coogan's."
Back in the 70s and 80s, I would park my car on the street above where the Polo Grounds once stood and walk across Macomb's Dam Bridge to Yankee Stadium. It was easy in, easy out, and didn't cost anything.
And that's just about all I have on the New York Giants. Oh, one more thing . . . . "Ott" is commonly found in a crossword puzzle for a three-letter word for "former Giant great".

CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER
From Limerick, Ireland, it's Gary Clifford.
This concludes another installment of CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER

Michael Z. McIntee
mikemack@aol.com
Twitter: @WahooMike

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