Fake Apps From Apptitude That Someone Needs To Create ASAP
Just point this app at someone's chest and this app will estimate the size, shape and placement of their nipples.
Barry White Voice Modulator
Can't believe this one hasn't already been created. Every man should be able to up his romance game by sounding like the deep-voiced, love king of soul.
You'll need a water-proof case, but with this app, girls can pee on their phones and know if they're pregnant or not. Just think about the reduction in trash when people no longer need to by at-home pregnancy tests.
It's not what you think.
It will just add bangs to your photos.
See? Doesn't Reggie look spectacular?
It will add a bong to any photo of a Congressional representative.
Earl Blumenauer looks pretty lame here.
Bongress just fixed that!
This app will add a killer techno beat to any historical speech, making it so much more relevant for millennials.
When you press Histo-REMIX ...
... These ravers will pop up as well.
These guys can't be everywhere.
So, whoever designs the app will also need to work with a cloning scientist.
They've got fierce moves.
So, the app designer and cloning scientist will also need to work with a choreographer to instruct the clones on hot dance steps.
These guys wear killer outfits.
So, the app designer, cloning scientist, and choreographer will also need to work with a futurist fashion designer.
These guys use advanced glow sticks.
So, the app designer, cloning scientist, choreographer, and futurist fashion designer will also need to work with a chemical engineer to ensure enough awesome glow sticks are produced for each clone.
The app will put your photo on any magazine cover.
It creates ultra believable covers.
See? Nailed it!
It will tell you what cities you're a "10" in.
You might be a 10 in Boise ...
... But a 3 in Los Angeles.