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Wednesday, February 02, 2005

Top Ten Surprises In George W. Bush's State Of The Union Address
  
Instead of "Hail To The Chief," marine band played 50 Cent's "In Da Club"
Began with wacky comedy skit about Hillary Clinton fainting then yelled, "Live from New York it's Saturday night"
For first 5 minutes, President wandered aimlessly looking for his shadow.
Didn't bother to take off his iPod.
His curious decision to wear t-shirt: "The more I learn about women, the more I love my truck"
President paused frequently to sip from Big Gulp.
His nunchucks wizardry.
His tearful plea to Brad and Jennifer to work things out.
The guy wouldn't shut up about "Meet The Fockers"
When he accidentally "outed" Rumsfeld.
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The compassion in his voice when he apologized for preempting That 70's Show.

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The off-putting sight of Cheney gnawing on fistful of jerky.

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Explaining the intricacies of his tax plan using sock puppets.

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The special device he put on the microphone to make him sound cool like Ricardo Montalban.

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Well, there was the part when he surrendered to Kim Jong Il.

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Jokes in speech punctuated with slide whistles and rim shots.

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