DAVETV If you could look at only one thing on the Internet, DaveTV would be the obvious choice. What other so-called "website" lets you watch LATE SHOW Highlights, Comedy Clips, Slideshows, Stupid Trick clips and The Tony Mendez Show?
TOP TEN LIST You know it, you love it, you can't live without it: the revolutionary comedy bit that won Dave the Nobel Peace Prize. Check out the latest Top Ten List here.
TOP TEN ARCHIVES Old Top Ten Lists never die, they just get archived. The Top Ten Archives is searchable by date and keyword. Also, please note that the word "archives" contains the word "chives."
TOP TEN CONTEST So you think you're as funny as Dave's writers? Or maybe you just enjoy wasting time at work? See if you've got the chops to win a great prize in our weekly Top Ten Contest.
TOP TEN SEARCH Search Results.
TOP TEN SEARCH Search Results.
WAHOO GAZETTE LATE SHOW staffer Mike McIntee gives you a daily show summary and the behind-the-scenes lowdown with his daily Wahoo Gazette. So much juicy inside information that you'll say "Wahoo!"
THE WAHOO GAZETTE ARCHIVE Mike McIntee's popular Wahoo Gazette is archived here in the aptly- named Wahoo Gazette Archive. You can search by date, keyword, or show number, or even Dave's tie pattern (coming June 2012).
THE WAHOO GAZETTE ARCHIVE Mike McIntee's popular Wahoo Gazette is archived here in the aptly- named Wahoo Gazette Archive. You can search by date, keyword, or show number, or even Dave's tie pattern (coming June 2012).
Thursday, July 27, 2006
Top Ten Floyd Landis Excuses
"High altitude in the Alps made daddy dizzy"
"Who can resist Balco's delicious 'spicy chipotle' flavor
"I was trying to impress Sheryl Crow"
"Uh...global warming?"
"The world hates Americans already, so does this
really matter?"
"French bastards must have dosed my quiche"
"Wanted to give 'New York Post' excuse to run
hilarious 'Fink Floyd' headline"
"Hulk no need excuse"
"Frankly, I'd rather be a disgrace than a loser"
"Screw you - - I'm Floyd ***damn Landis"
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"Always wanted to be in French newspaper under
headline 'Le Jackass'"
·
"It's my dream to meet the ranking member of the
Government Reform Committee"
·
"Next you'll tell me my bike's electric motor is illegal"
·
"Am I honestly supposed to know what's in every
needle I inject in my ass?"
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"Had to redeem a BALCO gift certificate before it expired"
·
"Shouldn't have drank from Barry Bonds' water bottle"
·
"Thought 'steroids' was French for 'power bar'"
Johnny Depp Doesn't Watch His Own Movies He's one of the biggest stars in the world -- so why doesn't Johnny Depp watch his own movies?
