Happy Birthday Week To ME!!!!!

This was one heck of a week! 21 at last! Woohoo. Reasons to love my birthday week:

1. I'm in the Big Brother House.
2. I'm not nominated for eviction.
3. Dustin's gone.
4. I'm HOH.
5. I won the POV.
6. I got 2 birthday letters.
7. I got red velvet cupcakes.
8. I got to take a private jet to New York.
9. I got to leave the Big Brother House.
10. I met Drew Carey.
11. Jen is going home.
12. MY BIRTHDAY!!!

What a week huh? "Snails see the benefits, the beauty in every inch" that describes my feelings of this week. Before i get off the topic of birthdays, I must say a very happy twin birthday to Michael Dutz; I miss you & your meat log eating habits in the house. Also, my friend Mary Evelyn, happy birthday!! For both (pronounced boLth in the BB house) of my birthday cards, I am extremely thankful and I reread them everyday if not more. Beautifully made and means a lot more to me then I can express. It is those things that make you want to wake up the next morning and remember the reason that you're here and keep fighting for the prize.

"I have found the paradox, where if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love."

I honestly must say that after going to New York, it was so hard to return to this house. -(Ps keep a look out for Amber & I on ET)- It was mixed emotions all around. The fact that I got to get out and see other humans, drive in a car, eat food not in the storage room, chew gum, go pee without a camera watching me, you know stupid simple things that made me enjoy my time so much. It's a taste of the real world and it makes me want to go back so bad. Yet on the flip side, it makes me sit and think; okay there was a much needed break half way through this, there is a light at the end of this long tunnel and it is time to step up and play harder and make it out of here. Really.. weird. But it also makes me so so so excited to know there is only five weeks remaining and then I plan on taking about a month and a half off to regroup and for a lovely 'Eurotrip.'

Oh before I forget I want to say to Kail, I send my heart felt apologies to Oregon. The one week we wanted you to stay... No but really, I know that you know how I really feel since we talked, but it was really nice finally getting to know more about you and I'm really sorry that your game had to end that way. One of Nick's last day quotes was, "We evicted the wrong gay guy" (Referring to Joe obviously). Well Nick and Kail, now we evicted the right gay guy. :) Oh and all of us in the house have come to the conclusion that you (Kail) are the mayor of Rainbow.

Ok where to go from here... As usual, this has been an extremely eventful week in the big Brother house. Now I don't know if it is fortunate or unfortunate that I missed most of the drama and excitement while I was in New York. Apparently Jen had a nervous breakdown and is making a mockery of this game. She is walking around breaking all the rules of the game saying how she does not care because she is going home anyways. Also threatening that she will not be going to the jury house unless BB offers her "a lot." The reason Jen is upset that I nominated her for eviction is because she is here for a fun summer (ie. 15 minutes of fame) and seven weeks is not enough to get the full experience, she still has not got to play in a luxury competition to be involved with America's choice. No really, she said all that. I'm telling you, this girl is a wow factor, but not the good wow. All I have to say about this subject is Kail, you were the ONLY one out of fourteen people who wanted Jen to stay week one, thanks a lot.

"Life is nothing if you're not obsessed"

It is still so weird, I say everyday, "I don't feel like I'm on TV, at all; I just feel like I'm stuck in a weird situation." I can not even explain to you how weird it is living here. It has because the norm and I think real life is going to feel uncommon. Oh while I'm thinking of it, question for the Veto comp, "What percent of America thinks it is easy living in the BB house?" Wow. I really thought it was going to be a high percentage. When I saw it was only fourteen percent, as cheesy as it sounds, that meant so much. We don't know what you guys are seeing and how you take things and just knowing that everyone watching realizes that it is not easy being here is comforting. Either that or it was all the evicted house guests voting over and over. :)

Another wow factor, my dad. I must admit it was getting easier living with him, but I think as time keeps going on, its getting much harder. It is hard for me having grown up with my grandparents, never having rules because I was a good kid and I was trustworthy, to going into this house and my dad telling me what to do and trying to parent me. I have never really been parented and I think now that I am twenty-one and I have my own life that it is a little late. It is just really hard. I'm not used to it and maybe I don't cope as well as others would. I'm trying the best I can but with everything else going on sometimes you just break. This house is really boring, there is hardly anything to do so all you can really do is sit and think and dwell on everything !!

I guess I just want to say that with five weeks left I'm trying to stick it out and step it up. Again, thank you everyone watching the show for support. I can't wait to get out of here and see how this looks from another perspective. Which also makes me nervous. haha.

Lots of Butterfly Kisses from the blondie with knobby knees,
Daniele!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Eines. Funf. Drie. (i think I botched that spelling)

ps. The FSA is in full action. <3

"That's life, Sometimes it hurts, but it's sort of all we have."

to be continued...