Cupid

EPISODE 4
THE LOSERS OR THE REAL DEAL?

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The beautiful Lisa Shannon has sorted through hundreds of potential suitors, and with the help of her trusty and often poison-tongued friends, Laura and Kimberly, has whittled the number down to ten. These ten lucky men whom Lisa has welcomed to CUPID will now be vying for her hand in marriage. And now, it's up to America to help decide who goes and who stays in Lisa's life.

In the studio, host Brian McFayden walked out onto the stage before the live audience and made CUPID's agenda even clearer: "From now on, one by one, the losers-yes, I said it--the losers are eliminated until we have found the one for Lisa. It's up to you to spot the guys who are the real deal or who may be in it for just their fifteen minutes of fame."

After welcoming all the guys on the stage, Brian introduced Lisa Shannon and her two best friends--and guardian angels-- Laura and Kimberly. Lisa comes with a one million dollar dowry, provided she and the guy America chooses get married and stay married for at least one year.

Next, Brian explained the format of the Dates, designed to determine the resourcefulness and creativity of the ten suitors: each guy would be sent out onto the streets for two hours to make as much money as he could to take Lisa out on their date. With whatever money he had made, the guy must come up with the most creative date possible.

RENDA'S DATE: AFRO POET AT LARGE
First up was Renda, the self-proclaimed poet and street hustler from Queens, New York. Sporting an outlandish Afro wig, Renda energetically spouted poetic rhymes and even danced to earn his money. In the end, he managed to pull down $47.24. Before his date with Lisa, Renda's hope was that Lisa would learn "to accept who I am� a straight-up goof." Confirming his self-assessment, Renda bought Lisa an enormous Afro wig and referee-style outfit of her own to match the one he was sporting. For their meal, Renda offered up hot dogs. As they ate, Renda showed Lisa his poetry, and she complimented him on his handwriting. Renda topped off the date with a bang when he leaned over and gave Lisa an explosive raspberry kiss, or as he called it, a "Zerbert" on her cheek. It was hard to tell whether Lisa was disgusted or amused, or possibly a little of both, by the "Zerbert."

Back onstage to receive comments from the girls, Renda opened with a big "Zerbert" for host Brian McFayden. With their friend's future on the line, Laura and Kimberly weighed in. If Renda was under any assumption that Laura would go easy on the dates, he was quickly dispelled of the notion. She tore right in: "You're a professional street hustler and all you could come up with was $40?! Then you take the money and buy wigs and hot dogs?! You showed her you were down-to-earth, but it's one thing to be down-to-earth, it's another thing to be just down and out. And I think you should be out."

The studio audience groaned, feeling the pain Laura inflicted upon the hapless, completely vulnerable man standing before her. Kimberly went easier on Renda, admitting that she hoped he'd stick around another week.

When given the opportunity to speak for himself, Renda explained that this date wasn't about romance; it was just about having fun. The studio audience cheered for him as he stuck up for himself, giving the native New Yorker a boost of confidence. Lisa smiled shyly as Renda soaked up the waves of applause. She agreed with his sentiments, and claimed a first date was "all about fun," and that she'd definitely had fun with Renda, who smiled back and waved to his new fans in the audience.
( Renda's Date )

KEN'S DATE: DAY OF WINE AND ROSES
Next up was Ken, the equity trader from Chicago. Like Renda, Ken took his wares to the boardwalk, trying to sell red napkins he'd folded to look like roses. Even though a couple of potential customers shot him down, claiming his roses were "ugly," Ken managed a heftier score than Renda, netting $86.28 "plus one Euro" for his efforts. He then took Lisa on a tour of a winery, which Ken admitted was more boring than he'd hoped. Over dinner, Ken opened up about his childhood growing up on a farm. Several laughs erupted from the audience when Lisa tried to retain an interested look on her face. Afterwards, Ken acknowledged the lack of a spark generated by their date: "I'm hoping that she starts opening up more and more about how she really feels."

Back onstage, Laura had chosen a few tart words for the vulnerable Ken. "When Lisa chose you as one of the ten, I thought it was a mistake. When I saw that, I knew it was a mistake. She looked bored to death. I think we were all bored to death watching that." As Laura's harsh comments sunk in, Ken tried to retain his composure. To add insult to injury, she topped off her diatribe with the observation that "all the wine in that winery" couldn't have made Ken a more interesting guy.

Kimberly couldn't help but knock him as well, adding to the growing chorus that he, indeed, was boring. Ken defended himself, saying he'd done his best to take care of Lisa on their date. A scattering of applause followed. Nonplussed, Lisa recommended that Ken not try so hard on their next date.

HANK'S DATE: GEEK POWER
Hank, an options trader from Chicago, tried to raise money on the boardwalk by doing his best impression of George Bush the First, and netted a respectable $60.38. More important to Hank, though, was the reward of getting to spend time with Lisa, even if it meant, as he told Lisa on their date, "thoroughly humiliating myself." An enthusiastic Hank took Lisa out for a picnic and laid out what Lisa called "a very impressive spread." The date only got better from there as they talked and laughed their way through lunch. Afterwards, Lisa called it her "best date ever." Although Lisa was looking at him expectantly, Hank seemed to choke at the crucial moment, unable to follow through with a kiss. Instead, he offered her a hug. She leaned in and whispered in Hank's ear, "I don't want to leave you." As they parted ways, he confessed, "I'm dying to kiss her. But I'm the biggest geek in the world!"

Now it was Hank's turn to face the fire. To his relief, a wide smile crawled across Laura's face as she told him, "You have been a favorite of mine from the beginning. I'm falling for you more and more. And I think Lisa is too."

Hank smiled shyly, soaking up the praise, happy not to be eviscerated. Kimberly felt that the picnic wasn't a very original idea, but couldn't help but give Hank a big thumbs-up, claiming she knew Lisa appreciated that he was a "true gentleman." The studio audience cheered and clapped for the man who escaped destruction on the stage. Claiming, "I don't deserve the compliments," Hank tried not to get too excited by the favorable reviews, but was clearly looking forward to a potential next date with Lisa. For her part, a giggling and excited Lisa admitted she was "so smitten" with Hank that she couldn't wait for her first kiss with him. The audience erupted in cheers as the chemistry flowed between the two.

EVAN'S DATE: HORRIBLE HUSTLER WITH A GOOD CAUSE
The girls volleyball coach Evan threw himself wholeheartedly into the task of raising money - shouting and break-dancing in crazy rhythms, energetically urging people to toss more money into his hat. And what did his bravura performance earn him? A mere $9. The studio audience moaned and laughed uproariously when they saw how pitifully he had done. "I'm a horrible hustler," he admitted sullenly.

With so little money to spend on their date, the girls volleyball coach took Lisa to the beach. When he told her he had made only $9, she laughed right in his face. The two walked the beach together and watched dolphins in the surf. Evan had promised Lisa a Jacuzzi on their date, which turned out to entail throwing her in a "burial pit" and covering her with sand. As the air got cooler, things heated up between Evan and Lisa. After brushing sand from her lips, Evan slipped a towel over their heads to engage in a bit of 'private time'. The studio audience cheered their approval as Evan laid his moves on the accepting Lisa. Enthused himself, Evan summed up the date as "amazing."

Back in the studio, Laura teased Evan, claiming, "Looks like you had a great time." But then she admitted that maybe she had been wrong about him. She exclaimed, "Keep him around, America, because I'm dying to see what happens to him in Date 2!"

If Evan thought the girls were going to let him off easy, he was wrong. A suspicious Kimberly tore into him, "I don't trust you as far I can throw you. I think you're a womanizer and a player." A shocked Evan's eyes nearly bugged out of his face as Kimberly ripped through him like a knife through butter. Her evisceration continued, "I think the kiss you had with her was just to see how far you could get with her. You don't really like her, and I really don't like you."

His mouth gaping open, Evan struggled to regain his composure after the shock Kimberly had sent through him. He responded, "Do you want me to lay here and you just start kicking me?" Evan claimed that Kimberly had hated him all along and was clearly out to get him. But he promised, "I'll prove myself." Lisa recovered his confidence, however, when she claimed she enjoyed the date and that they had had a great time. The studio audience erupted in cheers as the blond volleyball coach's roller coaster ride came to a close.
( Evan's Date )

JOE'S DATE: WORTH EVERY PENNY AND MORE
Joe, the real estate developer from Elmwood Park, Illinois, tried gamely to sell "hugs and affection" on the boardwalk. Joe managed to hug just about every kind of person he could find, all sizes and shapes, even some that didn't necessarily want or need hugging, when one lady spurned his affection with her purse. Afterwards, Joe called his take "the hardest $51 I've ever made in my damn life." For their date, Joe took Lisa to get a pedicure. While her feet were being tended to, an impressed Lisa told Joe, "This is what marriage is for me." After spending $40 on the pedicure, Joe took Lisa out for pizza. They talked happily while munching away on what turned out to be a large, and expensive, pizza: another $40. When their date was over, Joe had spent almost $30 more than he had made on the boardwalk.

Back in the studio, Joe admitted he had cheated by spending more money on his date than he'd made on the boardwalk. Laura, however, wasn't bothered at all that Joe spent as much as he did on her friend, and hoped America would keep him around. She couldn't help but knock Renda one last time when she capped her comments to Joe with, "At least you didn't spend your money on a wig!"

Kimberly completely disagreed with Laura, scolding Joe for cheating and claiming, "The most important virtue in a man is honesty and fairness." Kimberly couldn't help but admit that she did, in fact, like Joe, and hoped he would stick around.

In his defense, Joe turned to Lisa and said, "If I'm at fault for spending a little more than I should have on the girl of my dreams, then crucify me. Because this gem, she's priceless." The audience was solidly behind him and cheered enthusiastically. Lisa loved that Joe had tried to make the date as enjoyable as possible, but warned him to remember how important honesty is to her. A relieved Joe smiled widely, soaking up Lisa's, and the audience's approval.
( Joe's Date )

SCOTT'S DATE: A KNOCK 'EM, SOCK 'EM HAPPY GUY
Scott, the corporate strategist from New York, was up next, literally taking it on the chin to raise money for his date with Lisa. His ploy? Offering passersby the opportunity to smack him with long yellow foam sticks for money. From all appearances, the punishment Scott absorbed looked like more than he may have bargained for as he was assailed by children, women and large men with powerful batting arms. Though bruised and battered, Scott came away with a commendable $61 for his troubles.

Before their date, Scott joked that he expected to get to second base with Lisa, then countered with his expectation that they would just have a good time. At a Mexican restaurant, he confessed to Lisa that he'd always been totally "nerdy" as a kid. Lisa seemed to appreciate Scott's honesty, as well as his frequent references to movies like "Me, Myself, and Irene." For his part, Scott loved that Lisa "got" all his movie references. At the conclusion of their date, Scott received a welcome gift when Lisa leaned in and kissed him goodbye. Flushed, he hoped that Lisa felt the same connection with him that he'd felt with her. If she did, he'd be one "happy guy."

Scott slowly turned to the girls for his review. At first, it looked like he was home free as Laura stated that she could see Scott walking down the aisle. But then the dream turned into a nightmare as continued, "but as the best man, not the groom." Scott's face showed the crush of disappointment as she went on, "you'll always be the best friend. You can laugh somebody into bed, but how can you keep them there?"

Kimberly offered a bit of relief from the pain as she enthused that he was a gentleman and that, "I really, really like you." Scott took Laura's comments as a compliment, saying he knew Lisa was looking for a best friend and that he was just the man to be that friend. The audience appeared to agree as they roared their approval of his comments. Lisa couldn't agree more, and raved, "You're a nice, sweet, funny guy," and looked forward to getting to know him better.