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Diary Archive
Apr 6-Apr 11
Mar 31-Apr 5
Mar 22-Mar 27
Mar 15-Mar 21
Mar 9-Mar 14
Mar 3-Mar 8
Feb 14-Feb 21
Feb 7-Feb 12
Feb 1-Feb 6
Jan 25-31
Jan 19-23
Jan 13-18
Jan 5-Jan 12
Dec 20-Dec 24
Dec 14-Dec 19
Dec 2-Dec 6
Nov 29-Dec 1
Nov 25-Nov 28
Nov 20-Nov 24
Nov 17-Nov 19
Nov 12-Nov 16
Oct 30-Nov 10
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April 6, 2005
I'm sitting on the bus on my way to school. I so do not want to go. I hate going. Hate seeing Adam. Hate acting all tough and strong around him. Hate that he's acting, too. Makes him seem so fake, like even more of a liar. On top of this, You Know Who pays me a visit. And guess what he tells me to do? Clean. Like he's my Mom. I'm going through this horrible crisis and all he can come up with is to clean?
April 7, 2005
Started cleaning my room last night. I found this little comic that Adam drew me. Classic Adam. It broke my heart. I just wanted to curl up into a ball and disappear. Be done with all of this. But I think I know why he wanted me to clean. I have to get rid of all that stuff. Everything that reminds me of Adam, I'm giving back to him. I can't have it around anymore to turn me into a wreck.
April 8, 2005
So when I was cleaning up I found some stuff that Tuchman, the school counselor, had given me. You know how he's always giving out books and CD's and stuff to the students to show how hip he is? Anyway, I went to give it back and this totally weird girl Chelsea was in there crying. And she went to Price and said that Tuchman and I had a "relationship"! Can you believe that? First of all, that's SO gross and second, now I feel like a complete ass because my cleaning's gonna get the poor loser fired. Great advice, Mr. Almighty.
April 9, 2005
Today Adam gave me back all the stuff I'd given him. Prick. What is he, like, just trying to get me back? At least come up with something original. What makes him think I want any of it? I don't want any reminders of him around. I gave him that stuff for a reason. Because I don't need any reminders of how stupid I was. He tried to do the puppy-dog thing, where he was, like, "I don't deserve this stuff anymore." Yeah, well, you don't. But don't pawn it off on me, either.
April 10, 2005
I went to Tuchman's last night and told him how it's up to us to clean up our own mess and it looks like it worked. He's quitting, which kinda sucks. I mean, he's a dork but everybody still liked him. But I guess he's gotta go find himself or something. It also made me realize that I was ignoring what His Holiness was trying to tell me. He didn't want me to clean up to rid myself of Adam. I just had to clean out all the bad feelings in myself. To try and let it all go and get back to normal. So I went over to Adam's and we got each other's stuff back. It was sad, but… okay. I think I'm ready to stop hating him, at least…
April 11, 2005
Crying again.
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